Clean Slate Productions presents "IN PIECES"

Nice closing shot! Missed it the first time... :)

I would have added a bit more coloured flashing lights for the cop car, but that would be nitpicking.

I've watched almost half of the entries. Top 3 for sure so far...

Mike
 
Ben, ben ben....

Ok... the acting was GREAT! And that shows your skill in directing. The second best element of this was the score/sound... fantastic! The look was great as well... nice, sharp, great look for this kind of film....

One critique is I felt it could be a little tightened.. the payoff is good, but I think some of the fancy edits, and post camera stuff could be tightened...

But... again, great work, this is top 3 for me as well! :thumbsup:
 
Ben and Gobo and crew. Nice images and all. Sound was really good. Can one of you come and do sound for me? xD

Closing shot was killer, as well.
 
Your lead actor was brilliant. F'in creepy man. Creepy.

Herman.. Killer score man. :) You really know how to move around your keys.

cheers on the entry!
/j
 
Nice job! nice lighting/style, good sound/music, herman is definetly making a name for himself. I really dug the b&w and the selective colors in the film. Davis did a great job, & props on everything else. you got my vote.
 
WOW! I have to run and I'm late but this film deserves another praise! Nice style, editing, sound etc etc. Kept me interested and glued to the monitor the WHOLE time and wanted to see more! Congrats, this is one of the top 3 for me. Good luck!
 
First of all, thanks everyone for taking the time to watch and comment on our film!

Kyser said:
Nice closing shot! Missed it the first time... :)

I would have added a bit more coloured flashing lights for the cop car, but that would be nitpicking.

I've watched almost half of the entries. Top 3 for sure so far...

Mike
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Thanks for the re-watch Mike, the ending shot really closes the deal i think. I actually like the nitpicking, lets us know where we can take it to the next level. that being said, we had an effects artist working in Maya to create red and blues for the end (i removed the reds from the car pulling up/cops running shots), but alas he did not have time to finish, that'll be just another little bonus (along with the 5.1 surround mix herman did for us) for the DVD or website.

Brandon Rice said:
Ben, ben ben....

Ok... the acting was GREAT! And that shows your skill in directing. The second best element of this was the score/sound... fantastic! The look was great as well... nice, sharp, great look for this kind of film....

One critique is I felt it could be a little tightened.. the payoff is good, but I think some of the fancy edits, and post camera stuff could be tightened...

But... again, great work, this is top 3 for me as well! :thumbsup:
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Thanks B-man, it's a lot of fun to collectively watch a community grow as filmmakers, as I believe you and I have over the past couple years. I can see where you are coming from with the edit, but I was very careful in the editing room to not draw attention to my edits, so that the focus was fixed in on Davis' performance. That being said, there's always a couple frames that could be tightened! Thanks for the comments.

Kholi said:
Ben and Gobo and crew. Nice images and all. Sound was really good. Can one of you come and do sound for me? xD

Closing shot was killer, as well.
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I could do sound for you, but it wouldn't be nearly as good as if Herman and Erik did it. www.herman-witkam.com (check it out, he's the man). That closing shot was the first one that popped into my head and it took a pretty big collaborative effort to pull it off, but was soooo worth it. Big thanks to Jesse on that shot, she was on smoke and lights. (anybody see the blood dripping out of the head too?)

Edgen said:
Your lead actor was brilliant. F'in creepy man. Creepy.

Herman.. Killer score man. :) You really know how to move around your keys.

cheers on the entry!
/j
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Thanks Edgen, the funny thing is that Davis is the nicest guy on the planet. But being a true actor he really dove into the part, for some shots he was physically exhausted just from putting all he had into John Abbot Mitchell (the last shot of the white room in particular).

Billy Pilgrim said:
Great job you guys. great cinematography, acting, editing, music, concept. The ending was great too.
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Thanks!!!

hiro said:
Nice job! nice lighting/style, good sound/music, herman is definetly making a name for himself. I really dug the b&w and the selective colors in the film. Davis did a great job, & props on everything else. you got my vote.
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I appreciate the note on the colors, some of those shots took many layers of color correction/masks to pull off. The shotgun shot is one of my favorites. :)

strancali said:
WOW! I have to run and I'm late but this film deserves another praise! Nice style, editing, sound etc etc. Kept me interested and glued to the monitor the WHOLE time and wanted to see more! Congrats, this is one of the top 3 for me. Good luck!
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Awesome! I think before we made any decision or came up with any shot, the question was asked "will this take away or add to Davis' performance?" And we took care to make sure that it was always the latter. For instance, you don't see another character until the last shot, even with the cops closing in, we had the car shot, silhouetted legs and the doorknob, all combined to get the feeling that there was impending police action without taking away from John.

So with that I'm really glad that the film drew you in like that, makes me feel like we made some quality decisions!
 
great stuff, visually impressive. and once again great score by herman ;D.

i do agree with brandon that it could have been a little tighter. but so far (havent watched all films yet) this is top 3 material for sure.
 
Brandon Rice said:
The second best element of this was the score/sound... fantastic!
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Thanks Brandon!

Kholi said:
Sound was really good. Can one of you come and do sound for me? xD
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Post production sound, sure - Send me a script and we can start talking :thumbsup:

Edgen said:
Herman.. Killer score man. :) You really know how to move around your keys.
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Thanks Justin! I finally got a 88 key full hammer-action keyboard, so that inspired me to write something for piano :)

Billy Pilgrim said:
Great job you guys. great cinematography, acting, editing, music, concept. The ending was great too.
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Thanks!

hiro said:
Nice job! nice lighting/style, good sound/music, herman is definetly making a name for himself.
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Thanks Ramon! :beer:

wesley said:
great stuff, visually impressive. and once again great score by herman ;D.
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Thanks Wesley! Looking forward to the next possible collaboration :)
 
The actor in this was solid; one of the best I have seen in any of these fests. This was the most enjoyable element for me and I wasn't too sold on the monologue itself as a short film, but accepted it when the talent nailed the performance.

I wish the short had been filled with more elements like the shotgun or the color of the last shot.

The black and white, although I can see why it was chosen, left it bland for me visually; seeing the color palette of this mans world would have been great.

Score and Sound I second.
 
J.R. Hudson said:
The actor in this was solid; one of the best I have seen in any of these fests. This was the most enjoyable element for me and I wasn't too sold on the monologue itself as a short film, but accepted it when the talent nailed the performance.

I wish the short had been filled with more elements like the shotgun or the color of the last shot.

The black and white, although I can see why it was chosen, left it bland for me visually; seeing the color palette of this mans world would have been great.

Score and Sound I second.
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thanks for the review!

Again, we couldn't be more than pleased with Davis' performance, so that's really what we wanted to highlight.

The feedback on the B&W is appreciated. The motivation of the B&W look of the piece was to:
A. not distract from Davis' performance
B. see if we could make the lighting somewhat of a character in the piece
C. reinforce and highlight the parts that are color
D. make the space he was in (the garage) unrecognizable until the end

We toyed around with having different backgrounds or something more visceral, I'd like to hear some thoughts (if you have some) on how we might accomplish this without forfeiting A-D above? We might have something longer in store for John Abbot Mitchell in the future (and probably in color), so any suggestions would be awesome.

Jesse did some really subtle things with the light, like glints in the eyes and highlights in the hair that are really artistic, some of her setups were pretty extensive, and she went the extra mile to squeeze out every bit of coolness, that extra 5%. Thanks again Jesse (seriously ... gobo ... get her on dvxuser.)
 
Kyser said:
Nice closing shot! Missed it the first time... :)

I would have added a bit more coloured flashing lights for the cop car, but that would be nitpicking.
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I'm still kicking myself over this, believe me. I forgot to bring the lighting gag I had planned on using to give the subject that lit by a cop car look, but Ben had a bunch of strobes and I had a couple in my trunk from a runway gig, so I figured why not. Then we got down to it and all those strobes were just not playing at all. The only thing I got out of 'em was the blinking on the left side of the door there, and that was from the biggest party light, gelled and hidden on the hood directly in front of Davis.

What I've really been kicking myself over is that I could have built a new gag right there; it's just a box, a bit of a stick, string, clotheshanger and gels. But at the time I was close to freaking out, I felt down to the wire and seriously stressed out. Not making your day on a film with an inflexible schedule is right up there in my DP's Top Three Nightmares. But we ended up wrapping an hour early, so...f&%k. Next time.

J.R. Hudson said:
I wish the short had been filled with more elements like the shotgun or the color of the last shot.

The black and white, although I can see why it was chosen, left it bland for me visually; seeing the color palette of this mans world would have been great.
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JR, thanks for bringing up that concept, I've put a bit of thought into it. Those two shots are my personal favorites actually. My interpretation as a DP was that in John's mind, black and white is in fact his color palette, loosely speaking. So in that context it works for me artistically. But...I was messing around with some dailies the other day though, put a little blue on a smoking shot and leeched all the color but a little bit...it looked freakin' awesome. Gives me a few lighting/shot ideas. But that would have to be within a different context. :lipsrseal

hybridtheory said:
Thanks again Jesse (seriously ... gobo ... get her on dvxuser.)
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She is, but she just reads the articles. Seriously.

Shooting B&W was a really interesting experience for both Jesse and me, and a bit of a calculated gamble at times. The original footage was oversaturated and the lighting was really blatant. Jesse didn't like the look we were getting at all, she's a purist about lighting well enough achieve the final product in-camera, and I really admire that.

But given our visual goals that wasn't possible here. Thankfully watching (and re-watching) all that BTS on the Sin City DVD paid off and it translated the way I was visualizing it, or else beers would be on me for the forseeable future.
 
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Well you definitely got into my top three :) That was very well acted a big thumbs up for your actor he was just perfect for the role, I wonder how you guys managed to film that intensity and not hide somewhere in the closet in hopes of not getting impaled by a copper tube!!! :) Wish you the best fellas, great job.
 
Dmitry Yun said:
Well you definitely got into my top three :) That was very well acted a big thumbs up for your actor he was just perfect for the role, I wonder how you guys managed to film that intensity and not hide somewhere in the closet in hopes of not getting impaled by a copper tube!!! :) Wish you the best fellas, great job.
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I know what you mean. There were some takes where we cut and the phrase "Ok, let's break ... Davis, you're creeping me out bro ... keep it up." was heard. And then of course you start to question yourself for writing the piece in the first place ... "Am I really this creepy?" ... but that's usually when the best stuff comes out.
 
hybridtheory,
Good job on this film. The black and white really established mood for me. The selective color added punctuation, and the actor was very convincing.

That impale vs. stab monologue will stay with me for a while. That blood puring through the pipe was quite the money shot.

Would love to see more from you guys.

Take care.
 
This film is definately one of the best, if not the best I've seen so far. I have no critiques, because I think the film was very artistic. The vision and the shots were so creative and I thought the flashbacks were right on time and didn't give too much. They let you see just what you needed to and imagine the rest.

The acting was great and I think the black & white was perfect. I think you can always say things that you maybe could have or should have done, but films are (at least to me) a form of artistic expression (on a deadline) and something very personal. Yes, we all strive to get better and better, but somebody will always have done something different - because we're all different.

If you ever need an actor, sign me up! Good job!

P.S. - Loved the shotgun shot.
 
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