when do girls and boys starting liking each other?

Randall_Oelerich

Randall_Oelerich

Veteran
I am thinking of writing a short script for that coming of age time when girls and boys stop hating each other and start feeling some sort of attraction; not a sexual story, just something with changes in dialogue, subtle behavior. Obviously at puberty, but does some sort of pre-puberty attraction start at an earlier age, a non-sexual attraction? For the life of me I don't know how early that starts. Googled and can't find anything on this. Anybody?

EDIT: Just found this website, somewhat helpful
http://www.teenagerstoday.com/articles/dating-and-sex/the-secret-life-of-boys-5506/
 
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I guess it depends on whether you want it to be mutual or one sided. Girls often start chasing boys much sooner. I've seen it kindergarten with my kids. 11 or twelve would probably be about normal for the early school yard couples that don't actually date or anything.
 
From personal experience…I’d say around 11 or 12 years old. Even then they have a funny way of showing how they like each other. In my case it was being mean to each other…seriously. I think it’s because at that age you just don’t know what to say and we all had issues with boundaries. This is the age I think when kids start getting embarrassed about the simple things in life but don’t quite know how to express themselves…so they resort back to what I call “infantile” behavior”....lol.
 
Sometimes never.

Don't read into that too much.

A better question would be: "When do women start liking each other?"
 
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I think that the film "high fidelity" got it right.
"One moment they weren't there, not it any form that interested us, then the next you couldn't miss them. They were everywhere, and they'd grown breasts, and we wanted... actually we didn't even know what we wanted. But it was something interesting, disturbing even."
 
Pre-puberty attaction happens as well, but everyone is very different in that regard. It would help if you better defined what level of attraction you're looking for with your characters. But as a general sense, the relationship type stuff can start around 12, but doesn't get serious until 16ish. As a vague average with absolutely no evidence to back it up except my even more vague memory that seems to be missing large sections.
 
For me it was 4th grade. None of my other friends liked girls yet, but I did. I felt sort of like a pioneer, a visionary, for a year or two there. But by 6th grade I was no longer the Jedi knight of romance. (Almost) everybody liked 'em then...

On the other hand, I remember being 'liked' by girls much earlier - like Charli said, maybe second grade or so. Girls are much more mature than boys...
 
I'd say 4th-5th grade.

Ted, if by "mature" you mean "thinking more like a mature adult," I don't think that's true at all. I just think boys and girls have radically different forms of preferred silliness.
 
I received secret admirer letters from girls in the 2nd and 3rd grades, and I had my my first genuine Crush on a girl in the 4th grade (8-9 years old).

I remember one particular moment, which was earlier in Kindergarten or 1st grade, when I became embarrassed about going to the movies with one of my close girl friends and her mother.
 
I'd say 5th or 6th grade from me. I had a girlfriend, but our relationship basically consisted of irritating the other person and having them chase you from one side of the playlot to the other. (Hm, don't know how much has changed in modern relationships). I wasn't attracted to girls my age until about this time, before that I only liked grown women. I wasn't interested in teenagers.

-Nate
 
For me actually wanting girls didn't begin till age 13-14. When I finally put down the action figures, I fell hard. My first crush, Simone, was a knock out. She was like a 14 year old version of Kelly Mcgillis's character from Top Gun. Took me two years to get a piece of that. But I couldn't get her to go steady, she knew I liked her too much and I guess I wasn't alpha male enough at the time. Then at age 19 I had my chance to finally to make her mine, but by then I didn't care because I'd pulled girls way hotter than her and the thrill of the hunt was gone.

I think girls notice boys first, at a really young age. Probably 10 or 11. Boys don't even know they are being clocked till way later in the game.
 
I'm 27, I still hate girls. So I can't really tell you.

;)

When I was 12 or 13, I still didn't associate with girls, I prided myself on being different and NOT focusing at all on girls, and then I started liking them from afar, and then I dated them and realized everything I thought I knew about girls at age 7 was basically right and that they are a huge waste of time, energy, resources, etc. And they have cooties, just like I thought. Only "germs" or "STDs" are the grown-up words for cooties, the concept is identical ;)
 
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JonathanLB said:
I'm 27, I still hate girls. So I can't really tell you.

;)

When I was 12 or 13, I still didn't associate with girls, I prided myself on being different and NOT focusing at all on girls, and then I started liking them from afar, and then I dated them and realized everything I thought I knew about girls at age 7 was basically right and that they are a huge waste of time, energy, resources, etc. And they have cooties, just like I thought. Only "germs" or "STDs" are the grown-up words for cooties, the concept is identical ;)
Click to expand...


...lmao use a condom and alcohol and girl issues and 'cooties' alike are not a concern!...


seriously however i became interested in girls around age 14-15; i became more deeply involved at 16 and from there on not much else was the focus of my endeavors.
 
I have a daughter who is twelve and in the sixth grade.

It seems like most kids realize there is something compelling about the other sex around 5th or 6th grade (eleven or twelve years old).
 
Yes. I recall only a vague curiosity about girls in grade 6, but one year later and everything changed, had my first 'girlfriend' complete with passing notes in class, meeting in the school yard, nervous as heck about an upcoming school dance and asking her to it. So I guess age 11 might work for a story-- my big question is how young can I get away with the premise of some attraction, 11 is pushing it, but then again with all the estrogen type hormones in our drinking water and coming off the plastic in our water and pop bottles, things have changed I suspect since I was 11.


Chris Messineo said:
I have a daughter who is twelve and in the sixth grade.

It seems like most kids realize there is something compelling about the other sex around 5th or 6th grade (eleven or twelve years old).
Click to expand...
 
Again, it's a well established fact that girls 'get there' developmentally much earlier than boys. A possible story idea might involve a little girl who 'carries a torch' for quite some time for a little boy who 'hates' her (as little boys often do in general where girls are concerned), until he wakes up one day and realizes he can't stop thinking about her...

They both could be 11 or so...

But that's a brutally tough age to cast, especially for girls, for the very reason the story suggests - they may look like little girls when you cast them, but all too often before you're done shooting they've morphed into women. That transformation can literally go from zero to almost finished in under a year. That's why many such actresses are actually several years older, and physically mature, but got cast (partly) because they happen to still have little girl-like bodies. The same issue exists for boys where voice-dropping, acne, and 6 month/6" growth spurts are concerned, but they usually happen a year or so later.

See the Harry Potter films for ample documentary evidence of all the above...
 
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