Super Trooper
Well-known member
...the readers of Empire magazine are retarded!
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,3-1637094,00.html
This is one of the most remarkably insane polls I have ever seen.
First and foremost...Who's missing (and one of their great films)
No Fellini - "8 1/2". No, it's not a porn flick.
No Godard - "Breathless"
No Ozu - "Tokyo Story"
No Bunuel - "The Exterminating Angel"
No Renoir -"The Rules of the Game"
No Bresson - "Pickpocket"
No Antonioni - "Avventura, L'"
No Herzog - "Stroszek"
No Chabrol - "Boucher, Le"
No Eisenstein - "The Battleship Potemkin"
No Fassbinder - "The Marriage of Maria Braun"
No Mizoguchi - "UGETSU"
No Kieslowski - "Three Colors Trilogy"
No Wenders - "Wings of Desire"
No Melville - "Samouraï, Le"
No Forman - "Fireman's Ball"
No Rossellini - "Open City"
No Tati - "Playtime"
No Pasolini - "The Gospel According to St. Matthew"
No Ray - "The Music Room"
No Wai - "Fallen Angels"
No Rohmer - "Pauline at the Beach"
No Nichols - "The Graduate"
No Tarkovsky - "Solaris"
No Keaton - "The General"
No Ford - "My Darling Clementine"
& that's just to name a few...my fingers hurt...
...but not bad enough to sh!t on a few people first...
In the film world, that is Treason, my friends. If your wondering who the hell those peolpe are, get to watchin' dem movin pictures more often. Now lets look at who dId make the list.
My "WTF? Him!!!"
This is not to say that these aren't great directors, but their place in the top 40 of all time is laughable. Lets start from the bottom up...
Gilliam - Great films, but not top 40 material...maybe could end up in the high 90's in a top 100 list. Besides, just look at 'im. Ugly a$$hole.
M. Night - Self-explanatory.
Raimi - Spiderman sucks ass. Period. On another note, Bruce Campbell does not suck ass. He in fact kicks ass. But, as pointed out earlier, Spiderman does not. This is not to say the Raimi sucks ass, but it in fact it is implied. Seeing how some may be confused, I will elaborate to the fullest extent of my abilities: Raimi sucks ass and Evil Dead is over rated. Groovy!
Howard - I don't care how many awesome films this guy comes out with. Opie ain't gettin' a top 40 list. I won't let him. PS. Richie Cunningham got it on with Potsy while Ralph Malph watched. You know it to be true in your heart of hearts. The Grinch is a green glob of sh!t that was flung onto the big screen. Seuss is turning in his grave, his masterpice he could not save. Hear that SPLASH? Well, thats Ron's career going down the toilet, cuz The Da Vinci Code's gonna blow (in more ways than one).
Minghella - I had to look his name up to find out who he was. This has got to be a f@#$# joke. I hope he dies a slow and painful death, much like what I went through while watching The English Patient. Die, Mr. Minghella. Soon.
Scott - Tony, that is. What can I say? He's alright, if you like that sort of thing (ie sodomy with a touch of incest), but nowhere even close to the top 40. A top 250 list...maybe. On second thought, NAH! Maybe Ridley could teach him a thing or two, such as "Don't make a sequel to a great film and replace the lead with a no good tramp and completely f@#$ up potentially cool Mamet screenplay for the sake of sweet moola." In fact...
Ridley - Take that you son of a *****.
Zemeckis - Gump beat out Fiction. That alone is a mark against this bastid. And whats up with Clarice's dad tunring out to be a mother f@$# alien. STUPID. Thanks to his producing skills though, he than makes up for it. Lets take a look: House of Wax, Gothika, Ghost Ship, Thir13en Ghosts, Ritual, House on Haunted Hill, Bordello of Blood, The Frighteners, and Demon Knight. I hope this dude rots in hell along with his horror films and a herpes infested Paris Hilton.
Cameron - Poorman's Spielberg. Or in this case, retarded man's. No biggie. His career went down with the Titanic. Dark Angel was balls, too. And Linda Hamilton's a dog. Celen Dion...nevermind. Lets stick to the topic athand: James Cameron's suckery. I hate you. Yeah, YOU!
Coen Brothers - Top 50 material, for sure. Unfortunately, just a few blemishes spoiled it for them. The Lady Killers, Intolerable Cruelty, O Brother, Where Art Thou?, The Hudsucker Proxy, Raising Arizona. Wait a minute, half of their filmography is sh!t! Oh well, they can keep Gilliam company in the 90's. Joel and Ethan should make like siamese twins and split, and then one of them dies due to complications, and then the other out of sadness.
Tarantino - Gotta do a HELL of alot more to make number 8, buddy, not to mention the top 40. I might be easier on him if he wasn't such a prick. I hope that the demons from Zemeckis' films pick at QT's bones as he's burning in the CITY OF FIRE, and then the demon's put pieces if his flesh together with other people's flesh and make a whole new person, and then Satan partakes in anal rape ala Deliverance, which had nothing to with Pulp Fiction, nor any other unknown Asian film that is ripe for the picking you egotistical megalomaniac mother f@#$@#. Your gonna burn for this, baby. The audience is eatin' it up, but soon, oh so soon, they'll be eating you up.
Jackson - Peter Jackson. Sigh. It's not even worth it. **insert insult here**
and, for the sole purpose of getting Hudson angry...
Steven Spielberg - HAH! Post ten thousand times, will ya? Maybe you'll think twice next...ten thousand times.
Not working? Zombies suck!
Okay, glad I got that out of my system. Lastly, lets just take a look at the order of thins here. This is where it's really f@$# up.
According to the Poll:
Peter Jackson > Orson Welles
The End. That alone makes the case.
Oh, and Spielberg deserves to be in the top 10, but number 1? I won't contend it too much because...well, I'm afraid. Hudson is pulling a Cape Fear on me. Every where I go, I see him in the distance, watching me, undressing me with his eyes. Last week he barged in during my Chem Lab and started sticking his thumb in my mouth. I have a strange suspicion that this is going to end in tears.
Hudson quotes:
"I am going to stick my HOOK up your TERMINAL."
"Open your JAWS and I'll introduce you to THE COLOR PURPLE."
"Your mine *****!"
Any one else getting messages like this, or is it just me?
Now, you may be wondering:
"It's just a poll, Troop. Besides, people have their own tastes and have the right to express their own opinions."
Go to hell. My opinions are right and yours are wrong. If you don't agree with me, then you have no taste. Don't be stupid.
"What's up with the gay references, dude?"
Uh...RACIST!
"Why are you so angry?"
I got something in my eye. It hurts and it won't come out. Is there a hotline or something for this?
That's it for now. If any one actually reads this, remember:
"Ha ha ha! Oh gosh that's funny! That's really funny! Do you write your own material? Do you? Because that is so fresh. You are the weakest link goodbye. You know, I've, I've never heard anyone make that joke before. Hmm. You're the first. I've never heard anyone reference, reference that outside the program before. Because that's what she says on the show right? Isn't it? You are the weakest link goodbye. And, and yet you've taken that and used it out of context to insult me in this everyday situation. God what a clever, smart girl you must be, to come up with a joke like that all by yourself. That's so fresh too. Any, any Titanic jokes you want to throw at me too as long as we're hitting these phenomena at the height of their popularity. God you're so funny!"
*Over&Out*
http://www.timesonline.co.uk/article/0,,3-1637094,00.html
This is one of the most remarkably insane polls I have ever seen.
First and foremost...Who's missing (and one of their great films)
No Fellini - "8 1/2". No, it's not a porn flick.
No Godard - "Breathless"
No Ozu - "Tokyo Story"
No Bunuel - "The Exterminating Angel"
No Renoir -"The Rules of the Game"
No Bresson - "Pickpocket"
No Antonioni - "Avventura, L'"
No Herzog - "Stroszek"
No Chabrol - "Boucher, Le"
No Eisenstein - "The Battleship Potemkin"
No Fassbinder - "The Marriage of Maria Braun"
No Mizoguchi - "UGETSU"
No Kieslowski - "Three Colors Trilogy"
No Wenders - "Wings of Desire"
No Melville - "Samouraï, Le"
No Forman - "Fireman's Ball"
No Rossellini - "Open City"
No Tati - "Playtime"
No Pasolini - "The Gospel According to St. Matthew"
No Ray - "The Music Room"
No Wai - "Fallen Angels"
No Rohmer - "Pauline at the Beach"
No Nichols - "The Graduate"
No Tarkovsky - "Solaris"
No Keaton - "The General"
No Ford - "My Darling Clementine"
& that's just to name a few...my fingers hurt...
...but not bad enough to sh!t on a few people first...
In the film world, that is Treason, my friends. If your wondering who the hell those peolpe are, get to watchin' dem movin pictures more often. Now lets look at who dId make the list.
My "WTF? Him!!!"
This is not to say that these aren't great directors, but their place in the top 40 of all time is laughable. Lets start from the bottom up...
Gilliam - Great films, but not top 40 material...maybe could end up in the high 90's in a top 100 list. Besides, just look at 'im. Ugly a$$hole.
M. Night - Self-explanatory.
Raimi - Spiderman sucks ass. Period. On another note, Bruce Campbell does not suck ass. He in fact kicks ass. But, as pointed out earlier, Spiderman does not. This is not to say the Raimi sucks ass, but it in fact it is implied. Seeing how some may be confused, I will elaborate to the fullest extent of my abilities: Raimi sucks ass and Evil Dead is over rated. Groovy!
Howard - I don't care how many awesome films this guy comes out with. Opie ain't gettin' a top 40 list. I won't let him. PS. Richie Cunningham got it on with Potsy while Ralph Malph watched. You know it to be true in your heart of hearts. The Grinch is a green glob of sh!t that was flung onto the big screen. Seuss is turning in his grave, his masterpice he could not save. Hear that SPLASH? Well, thats Ron's career going down the toilet, cuz The Da Vinci Code's gonna blow (in more ways than one).
Minghella - I had to look his name up to find out who he was. This has got to be a f@#$# joke. I hope he dies a slow and painful death, much like what I went through while watching The English Patient. Die, Mr. Minghella. Soon.
Scott - Tony, that is. What can I say? He's alright, if you like that sort of thing (ie sodomy with a touch of incest), but nowhere even close to the top 40. A top 250 list...maybe. On second thought, NAH! Maybe Ridley could teach him a thing or two, such as "Don't make a sequel to a great film and replace the lead with a no good tramp and completely f@#$ up potentially cool Mamet screenplay for the sake of sweet moola." In fact...
Ridley - Take that you son of a *****.
Zemeckis - Gump beat out Fiction. That alone is a mark against this bastid. And whats up with Clarice's dad tunring out to be a mother f@$# alien. STUPID. Thanks to his producing skills though, he than makes up for it. Lets take a look: House of Wax, Gothika, Ghost Ship, Thir13en Ghosts, Ritual, House on Haunted Hill, Bordello of Blood, The Frighteners, and Demon Knight. I hope this dude rots in hell along with his horror films and a herpes infested Paris Hilton.
Cameron - Poorman's Spielberg. Or in this case, retarded man's. No biggie. His career went down with the Titanic. Dark Angel was balls, too. And Linda Hamilton's a dog. Celen Dion...nevermind. Lets stick to the topic athand: James Cameron's suckery. I hate you. Yeah, YOU!
Coen Brothers - Top 50 material, for sure. Unfortunately, just a few blemishes spoiled it for them. The Lady Killers, Intolerable Cruelty, O Brother, Where Art Thou?, The Hudsucker Proxy, Raising Arizona. Wait a minute, half of their filmography is sh!t! Oh well, they can keep Gilliam company in the 90's. Joel and Ethan should make like siamese twins and split, and then one of them dies due to complications, and then the other out of sadness.
Tarantino - Gotta do a HELL of alot more to make number 8, buddy, not to mention the top 40. I might be easier on him if he wasn't such a prick. I hope that the demons from Zemeckis' films pick at QT's bones as he's burning in the CITY OF FIRE, and then the demon's put pieces if his flesh together with other people's flesh and make a whole new person, and then Satan partakes in anal rape ala Deliverance, which had nothing to with Pulp Fiction, nor any other unknown Asian film that is ripe for the picking you egotistical megalomaniac mother f@#$@#. Your gonna burn for this, baby. The audience is eatin' it up, but soon, oh so soon, they'll be eating you up.
Jackson - Peter Jackson. Sigh. It's not even worth it. **insert insult here**
and, for the sole purpose of getting Hudson angry...
Steven Spielberg - HAH! Post ten thousand times, will ya? Maybe you'll think twice next...ten thousand times.
Not working? Zombies suck!
Okay, glad I got that out of my system. Lastly, lets just take a look at the order of thins here. This is where it's really f@$# up.
According to the Poll:
Peter Jackson > Orson Welles
The End. That alone makes the case.
Oh, and Spielberg deserves to be in the top 10, but number 1? I won't contend it too much because...well, I'm afraid. Hudson is pulling a Cape Fear on me. Every where I go, I see him in the distance, watching me, undressing me with his eyes. Last week he barged in during my Chem Lab and started sticking his thumb in my mouth. I have a strange suspicion that this is going to end in tears.
Hudson quotes:
"I am going to stick my HOOK up your TERMINAL."
"Open your JAWS and I'll introduce you to THE COLOR PURPLE."
"Your mine *****!"
Any one else getting messages like this, or is it just me?
Now, you may be wondering:
"It's just a poll, Troop. Besides, people have their own tastes and have the right to express their own opinions."
Go to hell. My opinions are right and yours are wrong. If you don't agree with me, then you have no taste. Don't be stupid.
"What's up with the gay references, dude?"
Uh...RACIST!
"Why are you so angry?"
I got something in my eye. It hurts and it won't come out. Is there a hotline or something for this?
That's it for now. If any one actually reads this, remember:
"Ha ha ha! Oh gosh that's funny! That's really funny! Do you write your own material? Do you? Because that is so fresh. You are the weakest link goodbye. You know, I've, I've never heard anyone make that joke before. Hmm. You're the first. I've never heard anyone reference, reference that outside the program before. Because that's what she says on the show right? Isn't it? You are the weakest link goodbye. And, and yet you've taken that and used it out of context to insult me in this everyday situation. God what a clever, smart girl you must be, to come up with a joke like that all by yourself. That's so fresh too. Any, any Titanic jokes you want to throw at me too as long as we're hitting these phenomena at the height of their popularity. God you're so funny!"
*Over&Out*
