Yeah, I totally agree. Definitely stuff from earlier on that I would hate to have listed on IMDb. And it's not like you can just remove it. In fact, I think it's near impossible.
Should I even bother submitting my first short to festivals if I'm not happy with it?
- Thread starter sb2012
- Start date
Yeah, I totally agree. Definitely stuff from earlier on that I would hate to have listed on IMDb. And it's not like you can just remove it. In fact, I think it's near impossible.
The problem is... nearly $1500 to $2000 was spent on this 20 min short film. While I agree with those of you who say you'd rather not show it if it makes you feel a certain way, but would you still consider that option when thinking about all that money that was blown away on it?
swopiv
Active member
Whether you decide to submit or screen it or not is up to you. The important thing is, it looks like you have identified the problem areas. Hopefully you can learn from these points for next time. And on that next film you will have different problems to learn from.
One or two points I would make, based on your text:
-Don't let actors or others intimidate you just because you're new to it. You are the director, you have a certain vision of how the film should look and how it should play out. Have confidence in this.
-A cinematographer who is quite happy to shoot an entire film without a tripod? Don't use him again.
-Planning and pre production is key. It sounds like a shot list would have saved you a lot of time on the first day.
-If you want to apply an effect in post but don't know how to achieve it, search. Ask here for advice beforehand, or ask Google: http://bit.ly/Qtiroe. A dream sequence is likely to be a popular type of effect and there are hundreds of ways to do it, and probably hundreds of tutorials on how to achieve it. Pick the one that suits your film best.
D.
One or two points I would make, based on your text:
-Don't let actors or others intimidate you just because you're new to it. You are the director, you have a certain vision of how the film should look and how it should play out. Have confidence in this.
-A cinematographer who is quite happy to shoot an entire film without a tripod? Don't use him again.
-Planning and pre production is key. It sounds like a shot list would have saved you a lot of time on the first day.
-If you want to apply an effect in post but don't know how to achieve it, search. Ask here for advice beforehand, or ask Google: http://bit.ly/Qtiroe. A dream sequence is likely to be a popular type of effect and there are hundreds of ways to do it, and probably hundreds of tutorials on how to achieve it. Pick the one that suits your film best.
D.
Seeking feedback on my first short film on YouTube... anyone interested?
Seeking feedback on my first short film on YouTube... anyone interested?
Hi all, I finally uploaded my very first short film to Youtube. This is actually related to a previous post of mine: http://www.dvxuser.com/V6/showthrea...t-short-to-festivals-if-I-m-not-happy-with-it
Basically, I had a lot of issues putting this film together, not everything went as planned but it cost me nearly $2000 to complete and I'm wondering if you guys think whether or not it's too horrible to submit to a festival or show to a production company. Here are some of the main issues:
1. I'm not too happy with the make up in the final scene where the protagonist is supposed to be dead (the scene that is in black and white on the beach).
2. The guy who plays the male psychiatrist in the beginning didn't have all his lines down (I know, I know) and in some shots I fear it may look too obvious like he's reading a script.
3. The camera man forgot to bring a tripod so some shots have a bit of a shaky cam.
4. The color may be a little out of whack in some spots due to an editing issue. I tried to delegate time by putting together a rough cut on imovie and then transfer that to my editor's Final Cut Pro, but the transfer didn't go so well and the imovie shots looked grainier but we corrected them the best we could, it's not perfect though.
Again, it was my first short film, it went way over schedule (mainly my fault on that one), not everything went as planned. I'm hoping I can do something with this film considering all the money and effort into it. So I'd really appreciate your feedback as to whether or not I should bother showing this around to festivals and production companies. Those associated with the film apparently have no issue with it, neither does my family, but I'd like to see the feedback of those outside of my immediate circle.
I uploaded as an "Unlisted" video on youtube, meaning that you can only view it if you have the link. For privacy purposes, I would like to PM that link to those of you who are interested in viewing the short film and you can reply here. Just respond to this message and I will PM you the link. Again, I'd really appreciate your help, guys. It's a psychological horror with one character and one main setting.
Seeking feedback on my first short film on YouTube... anyone interested?
Hi all, I finally uploaded my very first short film to Youtube. This is actually related to a previous post of mine: http://www.dvxuser.com/V6/showthrea...t-short-to-festivals-if-I-m-not-happy-with-it
Basically, I had a lot of issues putting this film together, not everything went as planned but it cost me nearly $2000 to complete and I'm wondering if you guys think whether or not it's too horrible to submit to a festival or show to a production company. Here are some of the main issues:
1. I'm not too happy with the make up in the final scene where the protagonist is supposed to be dead (the scene that is in black and white on the beach).
2. The guy who plays the male psychiatrist in the beginning didn't have all his lines down (I know, I know) and in some shots I fear it may look too obvious like he's reading a script.
3. The camera man forgot to bring a tripod so some shots have a bit of a shaky cam.
4. The color may be a little out of whack in some spots due to an editing issue. I tried to delegate time by putting together a rough cut on imovie and then transfer that to my editor's Final Cut Pro, but the transfer didn't go so well and the imovie shots looked grainier but we corrected them the best we could, it's not perfect though.
Again, it was my first short film, it went way over schedule (mainly my fault on that one), not everything went as planned. I'm hoping I can do something with this film considering all the money and effort into it. So I'd really appreciate your feedback as to whether or not I should bother showing this around to festivals and production companies. Those associated with the film apparently have no issue with it, neither does my family, but I'd like to see the feedback of those outside of my immediate circle.
I uploaded as an "Unlisted" video on youtube, meaning that you can only view it if you have the link. For privacy purposes, I would like to PM that link to those of you who are interested in viewing the short film and you can reply here. Just respond to this message and I will PM you the link. Again, I'd really appreciate your help, guys. It's a psychological horror with one character and one main setting.
i don't think that thread is any different than the other thread you have linked.just update your first post on the other thread and add one post at the end of the thread stating that you updated the first post, and that you currently have the movie on youtube as unlisted and request feedback there. and then ask a mod to delete this thread.
UPDATE... I finally uploaded the short film to Youtube as an "Unlisted" video, meaning you can view it only if you have the link. For privacy purposes, I would like to PM that link to those of you who are interested in viewing the short film and you can reply here. Just respond to this message and I will PM you the link. Again, I'd really appreciate your help, guys. It's a psychological horror with one character and one main setting.
Egg Born Son
Veteran
Just pop the link in this thread or in it's own thread in User films. Everyone on this site is an aspiring filmmaker of some capacity. It's not the same as a public release and the responses will be constructive crticism you can take on board or ignore as you see fit. How much money you spent on it shouldn't be the reason you do or don't screen it but whether or not you're proud of it. Even if you're not proud of it now, one day it may be a fond memory and reminder of how far you've come. Sometimes you find early works by filmmaker's as bonus features on a DVD. M.Night Shyalaman has videos he made as a kid on one of his. Terrible but even then you could see the roots of some things he still does.
Egg Born Son,
Damn, I missed that forum, I should have posted it there instead. Good point, sorry about that. Well, I guess since I already have this thread up, I'll just post it here. Well, here it is:
http://youtu.be/kNflTCQbnEs
Damn, I missed that forum, I should have posted it there instead. Good point, sorry about that. Well, I guess since I already have this thread up, I'll just post it here. Well, here it is:
http://youtu.be/kNflTCQbnEs
Egg Born Son
Veteran
Okay, here goes...
Framing & Camera
The first thing I noticed is the easiest to fix. This looks like a 16:9 conformed to a 4:3 frame. Resulting in being squished horizontally.
Camera was largely well handled, no focus issues I could make out through the youtube encode. Composition needs a little work. Pretty much every shot featuring an actor is framed dead centre. Usually you will find actors framed off centre, giving some frame to what is in front or behind them. In the classic conversation sequence (counselling session) it is good to put each actor on different sides of the frame. The framing at 4.04 is one of your better shots. Because of where her eyes go the positioning to the left is motivated and the composition with the shadows in the background looks great.
Also note that the squished image may have made it seem more centred than it is. A good place to put the actor is on the lines created by dividing the frame into thirds.
Handheld. Some people love it, others hate it. Personally I hate unmotivated handheld. If the camera isn't moving I prefer it locked off. It is really distracting in closeups when eyebrows are bobbing in and out of frame. Motivated handheld on the other hand can be very effective but it works best when there are locked off shots to contrast with. To use your film as an example, the counselling conversation could benefit from a tripod, but the shots moving around the house work well handheld. As the film progresses motivated handheld even in the closeups can be justified by representing her growing madness. I won't say any more on this, just as many believe in handheld for everything (mainly camera operators is my guess). I'm not aware of a critic who doesn't hate it. But then critics are usually old, so who knows?
Audio.
As far as I could tell through my laptop speakers the audio was pretty good. This is usually the most telling aspect of an amateur production, so well done. There were a couple of scenes where the noise floor was a little higher but it was consistent through the scene and whether intentional or not worked well as atmosphere to heighten the tension. Especially in the absence of any music. Pretty much the only thing that stood out from the sound design is a couple more dB on the telephone voice would have been less of a strain to hear on my pathetic speakers.
The biggest thing I noticed was the absence of a score, particularly in the first half. When the first music entered in the middle of the film, the experience of it took off. It was instantly noticeably better. It may have been an artistic decision or it may of been a financial decision. The first half the film could definitely use some incidental music. It is okay to be sparse. There were a couple of moments in the back half that could have used some music but the sparseness of the back half did contribute overall. The moments with music had real punch and felt like they had a lot more production value.
Lighting
Overall it was just too dark. May be partly youtube compression and my crappy LCD monitor but the darker scenes could have benefitted greatly from some lighting to pick out the edges (like you do at 3.03) or dramatic lighting (14.00) rather than flat and dark (13.27). The overall dark mood of the lighting is commendable but a great deal of the film was just too dark with no definition and a strain to watch. Few of the backgrounds are lit at all and with a dark-skinned actress you have to make more of an effort to capture some definition, especially when she's putting in such a great performance.
It is possible to keep this dark mood without actually being quite so dark. 0.56 is an example of where it is totally dark but the blue light from below gives you that definition without changing the dark visual. This film is peppered with good shots like that one. The counselling session was a missed opportunity to set up some lighting to contrast with the dark apartment. This scene is very dark when it should have been a lot brighter. The shadows on the wall from the key light are unnatural for this setting.
The early scenes where you cut to the photos, the photos are possibly a bit bright or the non-photo shot need to come up. Like the scene at 4.04 I complimented before is too dark in contrast to these photos (doesn't seem to be the same room). Some soft diffuse light to bring up the background and a reflector or hairlight to define her outline would make these cuts contrast less, without significantly brightening the mood (allowing the subject of the happy photos and sad protagonist provide the contrast).
In the scenes featuring dramatic lighting, some worked very effectively, others were a little off. On the whole the intent was clear and I think even the lay audience is going to appreciate the effort made. Even if it didn't work out in every shot I'm glad you reached: keep doing this, you will only get better.
Editing
The editing is really hit and miss in this. But don't despair, much like the lighting the intent is obvious and where it doesn't work, at least you reached. Keep practicing these techniques and you will get better. The jump cuts in the kitchen really don't work at all. But then the sequence from 3.00 to the glass breaking is fantastic. There are some other really great passages...pretty much every scene with music is good. I think the music helped your editing rhythm. Another reason why more music is beneficial. The sequence from 11.47 to 12.54 in particular was brilliant.
Pacing is the other issue, at times you built up great atmosphere then failed to capitalise. Parts dragged, many edits didn't flow. You pulled off the classic 'person walking across the doorway behind them' scene but then squandered the tension. The black pauses between the main sections were way too long of a reset. The 'revolution | main' title on the front end was almost 30 seconds! On youtube if your viewer isn't hooked in 30 seconds, they are gone. You could cut as much as two, maybe even three minutes out of this film just by tightening up the pacing.
The editing is the most patchy part of this effort. Some bits are really good, others are slightly jarring with poorly timed edits and bad flow, failure to consider continuity of movement within the frame. In some cases it looks like it is due to working with the footage that you've got. In others it looks to be more a case of being less excited about the section than the cool dramatic bits. Where music is present is where the best editing is so my advice for the future would be to include more music to help your flow (or even edit to music which you then remove if you can't get rights) and plan your fancier edits in advance, or at least get more coverage for things like jump cuts so you can choose a better take.
Acting
Your lead actress is great. She sells the part really well. The mother on the phone was adequate, the counseller didn't have much to work with so was comparatively flat. The scary voice on the phone was too quiet but otherwise effective. The girl on the beach was fine.
Final assessment
Feel proud of this film. It has it's flaws, I'm sure very little of what I've given you is a surprise. And you've probably got a lot more of your own. But even though it falls short in a few areas this is an admirable effort. My favourite scenes were the lead up to the knife in the bedroom and the beach scenes. There were a number of short sequences and individual shots that were really good as well, notably the broken glass sequence and the 'walking past the doorway behind her' shot. This is not Cannes or Sundance worthy by any stretch of the imagination but it is certainly good enough to submit to a local festival. Other than a bit of eyestrain and forgiving some slightly awkward technical moments it kept me interested to the very end.
There is also the possibility of tightening it up with a new edit. It is good enough to justify the effort of doing so, rather than putting it to one side and moving on. I really hope you do. You've captured a great performance from your actress. She's mesmerising, something quite rare in an amateur work. The story hits all the right notes, most of the film is atmospheric and tension filled. It just tends to fizzle for a moment following minute or two long passages of good tension building. Take another look at it with fresh eyes and decide if you think it's worth it.
A long post. I've just given you well over two hours of my time. I don't do this for everyone. I'm motivated by how frustratingly close you got to something brilliant. Whether you rework this one or not, keep reaching. You will get there. I see a diamond in the rough when I watch this.
Framing & Camera
The first thing I noticed is the easiest to fix. This looks like a 16:9 conformed to a 4:3 frame. Resulting in being squished horizontally.
Camera was largely well handled, no focus issues I could make out through the youtube encode. Composition needs a little work. Pretty much every shot featuring an actor is framed dead centre. Usually you will find actors framed off centre, giving some frame to what is in front or behind them. In the classic conversation sequence (counselling session) it is good to put each actor on different sides of the frame. The framing at 4.04 is one of your better shots. Because of where her eyes go the positioning to the left is motivated and the composition with the shadows in the background looks great.
Also note that the squished image may have made it seem more centred than it is. A good place to put the actor is on the lines created by dividing the frame into thirds.
Handheld. Some people love it, others hate it. Personally I hate unmotivated handheld. If the camera isn't moving I prefer it locked off. It is really distracting in closeups when eyebrows are bobbing in and out of frame. Motivated handheld on the other hand can be very effective but it works best when there are locked off shots to contrast with. To use your film as an example, the counselling conversation could benefit from a tripod, but the shots moving around the house work well handheld. As the film progresses motivated handheld even in the closeups can be justified by representing her growing madness. I won't say any more on this, just as many believe in handheld for everything (mainly camera operators is my guess). I'm not aware of a critic who doesn't hate it. But then critics are usually old, so who knows?
Audio.
As far as I could tell through my laptop speakers the audio was pretty good. This is usually the most telling aspect of an amateur production, so well done. There were a couple of scenes where the noise floor was a little higher but it was consistent through the scene and whether intentional or not worked well as atmosphere to heighten the tension. Especially in the absence of any music. Pretty much the only thing that stood out from the sound design is a couple more dB on the telephone voice would have been less of a strain to hear on my pathetic speakers.
The biggest thing I noticed was the absence of a score, particularly in the first half. When the first music entered in the middle of the film, the experience of it took off. It was instantly noticeably better. It may have been an artistic decision or it may of been a financial decision. The first half the film could definitely use some incidental music. It is okay to be sparse. There were a couple of moments in the back half that could have used some music but the sparseness of the back half did contribute overall. The moments with music had real punch and felt like they had a lot more production value.
Lighting
Overall it was just too dark. May be partly youtube compression and my crappy LCD monitor but the darker scenes could have benefitted greatly from some lighting to pick out the edges (like you do at 3.03) or dramatic lighting (14.00) rather than flat and dark (13.27). The overall dark mood of the lighting is commendable but a great deal of the film was just too dark with no definition and a strain to watch. Few of the backgrounds are lit at all and with a dark-skinned actress you have to make more of an effort to capture some definition, especially when she's putting in such a great performance.
It is possible to keep this dark mood without actually being quite so dark. 0.56 is an example of where it is totally dark but the blue light from below gives you that definition without changing the dark visual. This film is peppered with good shots like that one. The counselling session was a missed opportunity to set up some lighting to contrast with the dark apartment. This scene is very dark when it should have been a lot brighter. The shadows on the wall from the key light are unnatural for this setting.
The early scenes where you cut to the photos, the photos are possibly a bit bright or the non-photo shot need to come up. Like the scene at 4.04 I complimented before is too dark in contrast to these photos (doesn't seem to be the same room). Some soft diffuse light to bring up the background and a reflector or hairlight to define her outline would make these cuts contrast less, without significantly brightening the mood (allowing the subject of the happy photos and sad protagonist provide the contrast).
In the scenes featuring dramatic lighting, some worked very effectively, others were a little off. On the whole the intent was clear and I think even the lay audience is going to appreciate the effort made. Even if it didn't work out in every shot I'm glad you reached: keep doing this, you will only get better.
Editing
The editing is really hit and miss in this. But don't despair, much like the lighting the intent is obvious and where it doesn't work, at least you reached. Keep practicing these techniques and you will get better. The jump cuts in the kitchen really don't work at all. But then the sequence from 3.00 to the glass breaking is fantastic. There are some other really great passages...pretty much every scene with music is good. I think the music helped your editing rhythm. Another reason why more music is beneficial. The sequence from 11.47 to 12.54 in particular was brilliant.
Pacing is the other issue, at times you built up great atmosphere then failed to capitalise. Parts dragged, many edits didn't flow. You pulled off the classic 'person walking across the doorway behind them' scene but then squandered the tension. The black pauses between the main sections were way too long of a reset. The 'revolution | main' title on the front end was almost 30 seconds! On youtube if your viewer isn't hooked in 30 seconds, they are gone. You could cut as much as two, maybe even three minutes out of this film just by tightening up the pacing.
The editing is the most patchy part of this effort. Some bits are really good, others are slightly jarring with poorly timed edits and bad flow, failure to consider continuity of movement within the frame. In some cases it looks like it is due to working with the footage that you've got. In others it looks to be more a case of being less excited about the section than the cool dramatic bits. Where music is present is where the best editing is so my advice for the future would be to include more music to help your flow (or even edit to music which you then remove if you can't get rights) and plan your fancier edits in advance, or at least get more coverage for things like jump cuts so you can choose a better take.
Acting
Your lead actress is great. She sells the part really well. The mother on the phone was adequate, the counseller didn't have much to work with so was comparatively flat. The scary voice on the phone was too quiet but otherwise effective. The girl on the beach was fine.
Final assessment
Feel proud of this film. It has it's flaws, I'm sure very little of what I've given you is a surprise. And you've probably got a lot more of your own. But even though it falls short in a few areas this is an admirable effort. My favourite scenes were the lead up to the knife in the bedroom and the beach scenes. There were a number of short sequences and individual shots that were really good as well, notably the broken glass sequence and the 'walking past the doorway behind her' shot. This is not Cannes or Sundance worthy by any stretch of the imagination but it is certainly good enough to submit to a local festival. Other than a bit of eyestrain and forgiving some slightly awkward technical moments it kept me interested to the very end.
There is also the possibility of tightening it up with a new edit. It is good enough to justify the effort of doing so, rather than putting it to one side and moving on. I really hope you do. You've captured a great performance from your actress. She's mesmerising, something quite rare in an amateur work. The story hits all the right notes, most of the film is atmospheric and tension filled. It just tends to fizzle for a moment following minute or two long passages of good tension building. Take another look at it with fresh eyes and decide if you think it's worth it.
A long post. I've just given you well over two hours of my time. I don't do this for everyone. I'm motivated by how frustratingly close you got to something brilliant. Whether you rework this one or not, keep reaching. You will get there. I see a diamond in the rough when I watch this.
Egg Born Son
Veteran
To address your original concerns off the first page of the thread:
1. The camera choice worked out fine.
2. The makeup in the beach scene looks great. I can see why it would worry you but I assure you it looks very voodoo. The seeming imperfection works. I've been playing with makeup recently and subtlety is lost on the camera. Bold strokes are required.
3. I've addressed lighting, it seems you will be much in agreement.
4. If the dream sequence you refer to is the one that culminates in the knife...listen to your cinematographer, it's the best sequence in the movie.
5. Ah, it looks like we feel the same about the tripod. If there wasn't one available there's not much you can do besides make sure you've got one next time.
6. Hmm. I'm guessing iMovie will never see the light of day on your computer again! If the raw footage was lost, that will be a shame. I used Windows Movie Maker on my own first effort. I couldn't let it live after what it did to my footage. It is now buried in a shallow grave in an undisclosed location.
1. The camera choice worked out fine.
2. The makeup in the beach scene looks great. I can see why it would worry you but I assure you it looks very voodoo. The seeming imperfection works. I've been playing with makeup recently and subtlety is lost on the camera. Bold strokes are required.
3. I've addressed lighting, it seems you will be much in agreement.
4. If the dream sequence you refer to is the one that culminates in the knife...listen to your cinematographer, it's the best sequence in the movie.
5. Ah, it looks like we feel the same about the tripod. If there wasn't one available there's not much you can do besides make sure you've got one next time.
6. Hmm. I'm guessing iMovie will never see the light of day on your computer again! If the raw footage was lost, that will be a shame. I used Windows Movie Maker on my own first effort. I couldn't let it live after what it did to my footage. It is now buried in a shallow grave in an undisclosed location.
You had it good. First thing I ever cut digitally was on Microsoft VidEdit!
craigbowman
Veteran
If you wait until you're perfectly happy with everything you did, you'll never submit anything to anyone, EVER!
Doc Bernard
Indie Arms Member
+1 on what Amr said.
Threads merged.
j1clark@ucsd.edu
Veteran
In general I don't 'pm for links' or almost any other reason... I'm think that others are of the same opinion. You can put your video up on Vimeo, and password protect it if you are worried about it being barred from a fest submission because of 'prior public showing'.
I will follow a direct link and passworded clip for review.
In general... submit to a fest is the only way you will find out if your work will be accepted. Worry never solves a problem, nor gets you past the front door.
Egg Born Son,
Thank you so much for your time and your very thorough and honest critique. It's very helpful. If you'd like me to look at any of your work in return, I'd be happy to do so. I'm glad we see eye to eye on many of the issues I brought up.
A few comments on some issues you mentioned...
<<The biggest thing I noticed was the absence of a score, particularly in the first half. When the first music entered in the middle of the film, the experience of it took off. It was instantly noticeably better. It may have been an artistic decision or it may of been a financial decision. The first half the film could definitely use some incidental music. It is okay to be sparse. There were a couple of moments in the back half that could have used some music but the sparseness of the back half did contribute overall. The moments with music had real punch and felt like they had a lot more production value.>>
Yes, it was an artisic decision. See, the thing I notice in too many horror movies (especially recent ones) is an over-use of music/score which kind of gives away what's going to happen next in a sense. I was trying to aim for a dreadful atmosphere, silence, like imagine if it were you alone in that dark apartment and you were seeing things that weren't real, just about any noise would make you jump.
About the editing and the jump cuts in the kitchen...
For the most part, you nailed the answer when you said "In some cases it looks like it is due to working with the footage that you've got", which is pretty spot on with what happened. We noticed a mistake involving two shots that didn't match during the kitchen bit, so we tried to use the jump cut method. But as for everything else, it was a matter of working with what we had.
The film took 2 days to shoot, day 1 was 15 hours and day 2 was about 5 hours. It was largely my fault because I wasn't planning accordingly with my shots (lesson learned though), that's why the first day was 15 hours long.
However... editing is another story. It took ***7 months*** from March to September to edit this short film. The reason? Conflicting schedules between myself and my editor for one, secondly, each time we fixed several issues we looked at it again and found several more.
It's gone through so many torturous edits that I began to think the title of the film actually lived up to itself in the editing room (lol). So it has come a long way from its original version.
Thank you so much for your time and your very thorough and honest critique. It's very helpful. If you'd like me to look at any of your work in return, I'd be happy to do so. I'm glad we see eye to eye on many of the issues I brought up.
A few comments on some issues you mentioned...
<<The biggest thing I noticed was the absence of a score, particularly in the first half. When the first music entered in the middle of the film, the experience of it took off. It was instantly noticeably better. It may have been an artistic decision or it may of been a financial decision. The first half the film could definitely use some incidental music. It is okay to be sparse. There were a couple of moments in the back half that could have used some music but the sparseness of the back half did contribute overall. The moments with music had real punch and felt like they had a lot more production value.>>
Yes, it was an artisic decision. See, the thing I notice in too many horror movies (especially recent ones) is an over-use of music/score which kind of gives away what's going to happen next in a sense. I was trying to aim for a dreadful atmosphere, silence, like imagine if it were you alone in that dark apartment and you were seeing things that weren't real, just about any noise would make you jump.
About the editing and the jump cuts in the kitchen...
For the most part, you nailed the answer when you said "In some cases it looks like it is due to working with the footage that you've got", which is pretty spot on with what happened. We noticed a mistake involving two shots that didn't match during the kitchen bit, so we tried to use the jump cut method. But as for everything else, it was a matter of working with what we had.
The film took 2 days to shoot, day 1 was 15 hours and day 2 was about 5 hours. It was largely my fault because I wasn't planning accordingly with my shots (lesson learned though), that's why the first day was 15 hours long.
However... editing is another story. It took ***7 months*** from March to September to edit this short film. The reason? Conflicting schedules between myself and my editor for one, secondly, each time we fixed several issues we looked at it again and found several more.
It's gone through so many torturous edits that I began to think the title of the film actually lived up to itself in the editing room (lol). So it has come a long way from its original version.
For those of you asking for the youtube link. I posted it a few posts back, but here it is again though:
[url]http://youtu.be/kNflTCQbnEs[/URL]
[url]http://youtu.be/kNflTCQbnEs[/URL]
j1clark@ucsd.edu
Veteran
I watched some portion in the time I had available.
The images were mostly dark in the first few minutes, with 'Q&A' type dialog...
If the 'rule of thumb' for scripts is that one has to catch the reader in the first 10 pages for a 90 page 'feature', for a short, one has to catch the reader on page 1. That corresponds to the first minute of the short film run time...
With that in mind, the 'intro' portion was a bit too long. The problem with stories that need 'backstory fill in', is... they do take a long time for the actors to get the words out, which tends to slow down the pace, and doesn't usually lend to building excitement.
On the technical side. The two actors have dark complexion, and dark hair. Placing them in front of 'dark backgrounds' requires something to bring them out, whether it is 'side lighting' to highlight hair or placement against a 'lighter' background, or some sort of 'top light' to also catch the hair and bring them out of the back ground. But in any case the overall lighting was 'too dark', for a 'lit room', and for the darker 'night' shots (I presume 'night'...), there were blank black areas that seemed to 'need light'.
On the sound front, while the audio of the man (therapist) was clear, the woman was low and tended to get lost in 'mumble'.
Sorry guys, you know something I didn't watch the Youtube version of the video until now, this whole time I was thinking you guys were seeing what I was seeing on DVD/regular TV, but youtube actually darkens the video a heck of a lot more apparently. It doesn't look this dark on actual video/DVD, so I tweaked the lighting a bit in Youtube's video editor. I guess youtube and iMovie must be cousins. Well, it says edit in progress right now so the lighting is getting fixed for youtube's version.