Once again, C&C my script please!

[mty10]

Hey Guys,

Just an idea for my next short film. Threw it together in a few days so... whatever. Okay with the ending, just not happy with how I finally got there, if you know what I mean. Also not happy with the title, haha.

Anyways, any Comments & Criticism would be greatly appreciated.

View attachment medacine.pdfView attachment medacine.pdf

 

[bwwd]

Id say make the boy special, give him abilities cause now its kinda regular boy, its just story about 2 people hiding from group of other people with guns, show that he has great knowledge of surroundings, knows how to hunt and setup traps, make one of the guys with guns to fell into trap that was setup by zach.Right now i didnt found anything special and i like movies about extraordinary people, so make your bush boy a young hunter with a lot of knowledge.Read some books about survival.
Thats how i would do it, you dont have to of course.