First draft of epic series needs critique please!

holymexicobatman

holymexicobatman

Well-known member
Hey guys,
I just finished my first rough draft of a new supernatural/drama series I am working on to be shot this fall/winter. I would really appreciate some critiquing and any advice you may have. It's a really tough story that spans from 1000 BC to present day, following the conflict and interventions of demons and their rival angels. I'm trying to use a ton of hebrew and latin vocabulary in this one to keep an authentic feel, maybe even have some portion done entirely in the native languages. We're looking to do 6 micro-budget shorts, 15-25 minutes long in hopes to gain enough hype and sponsoring to do a full length. The first completed script is current;y labeled "John Wycliff".

Here's the script's main page
http://pc.celtx.com/project/TG3HHgAstAcg

and our pre-production blog...
www.reehthemovie.blogspot.com

thanks you guys!
 
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Some grammer and spelling mistakes. I found the descriptions and dialogue to be a bit wordy and there was some exposition that pulled me out of the story, but overall, I was intrigued by the premise. Being a first draft, I'm sure you'll tighten it up down the road. Good job.
 
Thanks for all the input so far you guys! I need all the help I can get--I'm not a very experienced writer. Keep it coming! :beer:cheers
 
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