Can we be friends?

Brian_Rice

Brian_Rice

Carbonite Member
So I always run into this same issue when I want to recommend someone's film, short or series. For instance today I was recommending Staven's new webseries Hitman 101 on my facebook page, and my instinct (as it always is), would be to post "Cool new web series from my friend Staven", or "Hey, check out this new indie web series from my buddy Staven".

Like, if it's a Steven Spielberg movie I feel like I can say, "Hey, check out the new Steven Spielberg flick", but when it's an indie unknown, I usually feel compelled to recommend the filmmaker/actor/DP/sound guy, etc, not necessarily the film. So I prefer to say, "Hey check out my friend Kholi's new flick Superseeds!"

Is that weird? Do other people run into this issue or am I just truly bizarre?


(And because I was conflicted about this issue, when I recommended Hitman 101 today, I posted with a link "Good new indie web series from Staven" And, ugh, see? Just seems weird. But I don't want to just say "Good new web series" because I want people to know it's indie, and if I'm just recommending a thing and not a person I'm not necessarily recommending the thing I'm wanting to recommend).

So, basically, is it okay to call people you forum with "friends" when recommending their stuff?
 
I myself, dont refer to someone that I dont really know as a friend. But thats just me. Friendship means different things to different people. obviously. I usually say "A guy I know, or someone I know". I honestly only have a few close people that I call a friends.

When I talk to people about DVX USER, I usually say, check out this guys work, he frequents the same filmmaking forum I do. I would say whatever your comfortable with. If you want to call someone a friend, I doubt they will take offense to it, unless it's in all actuality an enemy.
 
Sounds good. :)

Saying anything else just felt unnatural. Like the "This guy I know from..." as was suggested -- makes me feel icky. Makes me feel like I'm distancing myself from the person. Maybe I'm just a language nerd or something. lol To me saying, "This guy" or "This girl" is close to saying "This one" or "that one" which, to me, indicates some separation. It feels cold. "I know a guy who does plumbing. Here's his number" sounds so depressing and less enthusiastic than does, "Hey, my buddy is a plumber. I'll give him a call."

Again, usually when I'm recommending something it's about the thing I'm recommending, but it's also about the filmmaker/writer/artist, etc. As someone gains more notiriety it gets easier, I think. Like I refer to Cybo and Weshoyot not as "my friends" but just as their artist names, even though I'd probably call them vaguely friends.

So DVXers get famous already so we can stop being friends! :D
 
Language is complex. In different contexts, the same word can mean very different things. In the context you described, I think you're very safe using the word, "friend", and the person whose video you are recommending should feel blessed. :)
 
I do the same. It's easier to say friend.

I say Timur is my friend. We've discussed 100's of things via facebook, DVXuser, and occasionally that old technology called a "phone" (you know, that other function our internet-texting devices can do.) But we have never met in person. The same with a couple others. However, I have met and become friends with MANY people on DVXuser. Perhaps a dozen or more I work with regularly every year. Thus far, all those I've met from DVXuser have been outstanding individuals, so now I'm really quick to give the benefit of the doubt and I don't hesitate to simply count any regular or friendly 'user as a friend.

Just remember, it's all fun and games, until your 'friend' turns out to be a sex offender or something. Then you have to say, 'oh, well. I don't really know them that well."

If we learn anything from politics, pretending to be friends with someone you don't know very well can backfire every once in a while. :/
 
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