"At my wits end"...

Phil

Phil

Veteran
I don't know what that means but I've been saying it lately...

Please help and give your opinion:

Today was my third attempt to shoot a project. This is my third project I'm working on out of 3 that I've written, directing, and everything on, second is a short film, first is a full length feature...

TO ANYONE OUT THERE ACTUALLY SURVIVING IN THIS BUSINESS, I BOW TO YOU!!!

I'm up to my eyeballs...in...everything. I've taken on more than I can...and it's slowly crumbling...they're all falling apart...from actors not finishing (yes, I'm ATF FILMS) to not enough money, to miscommunication due to insufficent production people...and as a mature adult now, I realize they're all my fault.

I teamed up with a partner who wants to do everything alone, just me and him...but really, it's just me...but it's too much for one person...that's why they're called "crews" right? :)

ANYWAYS...

I'm thinking about giving up...and going to film school...or back to college...I'm 23.

I know there are A LOT of you reading this who have been doing this for A LOT longer...I'm really just looking to see what you guys suggest.

As always Thanks a million...
 
Re: "At my wits end"...

This is just one project correct? How did the other projects go? They say you make 12 bad films before you make 1 good one right? I'm sure you've learned alot on this project that you will improve on the next one. Giving up and going to film school? If you're going to film school then that's not really giving up. As it is to help you learn the art of film. I think you're stressing too much and maybe you should just drop this project and either re-start it w/ a proper crew and different actors and spend more time planning. Or drop it and work on another project. Or if possible finish it, learn everything you can and have the "hell yea, I'm a pimp" attitude because you finished something you really didn't think you could/wanted to. I don't think people should give up based on Failure. I believe Failure is the best lesson you can learn. It's the only lesson you will learn from. ("Failing Forward" by John Maxwell is an excellent book for anyone). Sorry, if all that sounded preachy, but I'm sure you have alot more talent than I do and I couldn't imagine giving up. It's too much fun! Good luck. Tim.
 
Re: "At my wits end"...

Doing professional productions where you can hire and pay professionals is a piece of cake compared to indie filmmaking. It takes a lot of focussed energy to keep indie productions from flying apart. On one hand a small crew is a lot easier and cheaper to deal with, but that leaves an enormous workload for the director and producer. With a larger crew you have a lot more helping hands, but communication and management becomes a big issue, particularly with non-professionals of varying skill levels. The way, I'm trying to deal with this is by building up a core group of crew members that work together on multiple productions and collectively bring each other's skill levels up. As a next step, I'd like to start building a core group of actors that are committed to working on a series of short projects. I expect the process will take a while, but the goal is to have a core production group that feels comfortable working with each other and are more self managing like full time professionals. Don't give up yet, because it's definitely tough, but persistence is sometimes the only thing that gets projects finished.
 
Re: "At my wits end"...

I don't think people should give up based on Failure.
Click to expand...

persistence is sometimes the only thing that gets projects finished.
Click to expand...

Wow, I feel so lost right now, and those responses mean a lot. Thank you Slimothy and Barry.
 
Re: "At my wits end"...

oh, here's mine!

hello Phil-

Well, I'm not manning the ship on a short film, but I can commiserate. I would love to write more, but I am slammed ( trying to working on weddings )

Feeling like you are overloaded is no fun. especially with all this family, "oh, joy to the world" stuff going on.

You sound like you need re-organize your thoughts so all these bits don't seem so overwhelming.

What is working? Who is not Why. What can be done about that?

Go through all the areas that are buggging you, instead of looking at it as one collective mass of things you cannot control. the things you cannot control, you need to try and look at much more patiently.

Sounds like you are doing too much and can't really delegate to anyone you trust. Either learn to trust someone to do it, or scale down your expectations.

Don't give up. Heck, if you had to shoot it again, you would take a break, turn around and try it again. You've come too far to let it die.

Sounds like this is important to you and most things that are really important take some beating and torture to get through it.

So, as I write, the mess that is around me is incredulous. It is close to 2pm on the west coast and I haven't edited jack, even though I had some music overnighted to me for use this morning. got all kinds of DVD production parapenalia strewn all over the place, can't even walk to it, have to tip-toe and hop through it. printers all printer the wrong colors and crap.

on top of that, I seem to be getting more and more requests, pleadings for you know.."working for free" type jobs. plus clients that want more of my time for less..bmlabaslkjdflskdjflj. so, I too have wondered how people make money. If I didn't care so freakin' much about what I do, it would be a lot easier. I do believe though, the time you spend fixing, perfecting, re-doing, re-shooting stuff, even working for free for good jobs, will come back to you in better quality and gained experience. and satisfaction that you really did everything you could.

One day you will look at the end product that you like and the re-shooting will not phase you at all. If the end product sucks in the end, you will learn from it.
 
Re: "At my wits end"...

[quote author=Pooh link=board=Offtopic;num=1103230897;start=0#4 date=12/16/04 at 13:59:00]
Sounds like you are doing too much and can't really delegate to anyone you trust. Either learn to trust someone to do it, or scale down your expectations.
[/quote]

ha! I read that again and realized, I don't even do that yet!
 
Re: "At my wits end"...

Phil, your post describes filmmaking clearly.

If you were to expect it to be easy....well, I think you've figured out that one by now....

Making films is HARD work, in your case, work at a slow speed, what is your rush?
 
Re: "At my wits end"...

Phil, I feel your pain.  At times it is very easy to take on more than you can handle, especially when you have the drive to get this film done, and nobody else seems to share that sentiment.  
Don't freek out, your still young, you have lots of time to make it.  I am just finishing my BFA in photography this year, I'm almost 26 and have a wife that I spend time with as well.  The hardest thing is to learn where your limits are.  Don't try to make a film that will cost 20K for your first couple of projects.  Try and make a film that will cost you as little as possible out of your own pocket.  By this I mean, find other ways of funding.  There are many grants available for film makers, you just have to have a good idea, and a good proposal of how your going to do it.
If you start off with a low budget, or no budget film, spend lots of your own time making it look great, then with that lower budget film as part of your portfolio, you can use it as leverage to show potential investors "this is what I can do with no money, think what I can do with SOME money".
The other really important thing is contracts.
If you are paying your actor and crew, make sure you have a contract.  I know, even if they are just friends, make sure that they sign the contract that a. allows you to show their face in the film, and b. keeps them there for the whole shoot.  if you are paying these guys, then they need to finish the picture.

If you don't have the money to spend, then trade your services for higher oportunities.  LAst year I did 7 free weddings.  I absolutely hate to film weddings, and edit them as well.  I loathe it.  But, I have made some great friends and investors this way.  Give them the, hey I'll shoot your wedding/birthday/barmitsf (sorry I'm not Jewish and can't spell) for free, if you help me out a little with a future project.  You will be surprised by the people you meet and how this really gets your name out in the community.  Best of luck man, and don't get too down on yourself or your project.  Learn to walk away for a day or two (if possible) and then come back to it with lots of new energy.
 
Re: "At my wits end"...

I have to agree with Pooh and Pookie. Film/Videomaking is not easy. It's a lot of goddamn work, especially on the Indie front or if you're just starting out. Like most industries, you have to "pay your dues", which can include many things, from working for free on a good many projects to learning the hard way who you can depend on and who just isn't worth working with.

Believe me, your story is much more common than you may think, and it's also universal that relationships among dependable crews can take a long time to develop, especially if the people you're working with are on the young side.

The bright side of this is that this is how you learn the skills. You go through a nightmare project, and the next time you have the experience to see something coming ahead of time and know that you should avoid it or at least know better how to handle it...be it flaky actors who don't finish projects or crew that bail out. You'll start to develop more backup plans and you'll be ready for the pitfalls. I honestly don't think you can be really good without this kind of real-world experience, but that's just my opinion.

Again, the others are right. Take a deep breath, step back, and address your issues one at a time to find out what you can change and what you may still have to figure out. You may have to scale back a bit and work slowly towards your goals when you think you can handle it, meaning that your business/management skills have improved or you've found someone dependable that can do those jobs for you .

Anyways, good luck and give a progress report when you've noticed a difference.
 
Re: "At my wits end"...

Phil bro, you can join with my crew. We're open arms if you need us. We are all fightin the same battle. I like to work as a team not an individual. Even with the great distantaces we can still work as a team.
 
Re: "At my wits end"...

Dude, I feel for ya. It's tough. Real tough. But don't give up. This is the part of the movie where our hero over comes all odds ;) I wouldn't consider going to film school as giving up. Afterall, you'll still be doing what you love.

If money is tight and you can't pay people then you need to find ONLY people who have a passion for the craft. If it's just friends or family then they probably won't be very reliable. Hang in there (insert photo of cat hanging from tree limb).

"At My Wit's End..." was the title of a book I wrote.* So you're not alone.

P.K. Gillock

* Can be found at Amazon.com or B&N. :)
 
Re: "At my wits end"...

:'( Thanks guys...I was going to try to respond to you individually, but I can't with enough thanks as I'm feeling.

Pooh, Pookie, Scharky, Istoleyourbike, Bluespider, P.K...You're responses let me know, not only that there are people like me out there, stressed out and overworked...

but there are people out there who are trying and not giving up, for the biggest reason of all...They're following their dreams...

I just realized the true meaning of these forums...

I'm forever in your debt. Thank you.
 
Re: "At my wits end"...

[quote author=Phil link=board=Offtopic;num=1103230897;start=0#11 date=12/16/04 at 18:48:09]

...They're following their dreams...

[/quote]

Very important statement Phil.

I walked away from a dream over a decade ago and regret it tremendously. I'm glad I reinitiated the dream so the only advise I can give you is take it all in stride and follow your heart.

I have no doubt you will prevail!
 
Re: "At my wits end"...

Phil this is all part of becoming a filmmaker. When you are done with this you will know what they would teach you in film school. Everyone is stressed out over different things. Trust me be glad that you only have to deal with your segment. Hang in there and let me know if there is anything I can do to help.
 
Re: "At my wits end"...

Phil-

I also agree with the others... take a breath, refocus and remind yourself why you are doing what you do. Dont give up the dream. Never be a "wish I had"...wish I had done this, or wish I had done that. I remember in a post of yours kind of a long while back, you said you were very close to losing your job over time you were putting in to a film project. Dont give up on it now.

Terri
 
Re: "At my wits end"...

Hey Phil...For what it's worth, I always think of this when I get to the zone you're in. I go back in my personal history and look at the other silly moments of my weird life and I see how the moment kinda took care of itself and blended in. It always looks worse at the time you're feeling it than it really is. Don't stress it too much, just try to know that it's just another of life's many storms and it too shall pass. Hope this help you :)
 
Re: "At my wits end"...

Hang in man. The Past two days were rough ones for me. Had some issues with my computer, part of it was my fault for trying to do something that I knew should have waited until after vacation, but it screwed me up for 48 hours and now I am back on track and I have one job to finish and then it is off to Peru.

I was at a point to just physically demolish the entire computer and then decided to start all over on everything and now it is all fine. Sometimes it takes just stepping back and evaluating everything. Also, have a set time every year for three weeks and just leave to go somewhere. It will really make you get things done.

Like everyone said you a group of people around you who are goal oriented and have passion for they are doing. Don't give up, but find those people.
 
Re: "At my wits end"...

Dakotapod, Elvis, Thartley, Mino, Muir...Thanks guys. I'm going to hang in there...

After reading this whole thread, I felt like the cat that's hanging on to the branch poster...What's weird is...I look over and see my cat falling off my sofa... I felt it was a sign...

Then it licked it's butt... :P what does that mean?? ;D


Thanks guys...
 
e: "At my wits end"...

e: "At my wits end"...

[quote author=Phil link=board=Offtopic;num=1103230897;start=15#17 date=12/17/04 at 07:52:09]... I felt it was a sign...

Then it licked it's butt...  what does that mean??  
[/quote]

In some cultures it means "fame, fortune and happiness"

You are a very lucky man to see such an omen. ;)
 
Re: "At my wits end"...

It's all part of the process.  The fact is that this is no different than anything else you try and be successful at.  There is a price to be paid, and what you are going through is part of that price.  Most of all I echo thartley:  Never forget WHY you do this.  That is now, and always will be the key.  The HOW can be taught, but the WHY is within you...or it isn't.

Thanks for having the courage to air your doubts and frustrations. You came looking for help, but what you gave to others was hope.
 
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