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Lithuanian police laugh at themselves with joke contest

AP Worldstream
06-16-2005
Dateline: VILNIUS, Lithuania
If a Lithuanian police officer pulls you over for speeding but refuses to be bribed, smile, you're on candid camera.

Showing a funny side few ordinary citizens get to see, Vilnius police named this joke on Thursday the "most true" joke submitted in a contest to find the best, rudest, most original and most true anecdotes about police.

Winning entries were picked by a jury of police and Lithuanian celebrities from 375 ...
 
(11-29) 04:00 PST Panevezys, Lithuania -- The way Laurinas Sheshkus tells it, the creative types at LNK TV were searching last summer for a gimmick to rise above the airwaves clutter of Lithuanian television when someone proposed staging a beauty contest in the women's prison in this stolid town.
"It was, like, a joke," said Sheshkus, LNK's creative director. Worse still,
it was a joke that had the potential to exploit some of the country's least fortunate young women for the sake of a few ratings points.
In short, it was perfect television. And last week, the Miss Captivity Pageant became the runaway hit of the Lithuanian broadcast season. Two of every 3 television viewers sat glued to their sofas as a raven-haired 21-year- old named Kristina won a tiara that, one can be sure, not every beauty queen covets.
 
Isn't this great? We get to learn about other cultures!

The vilest Lithuanian curses are called profanities. They convey the direst things to another: a shameful death, eternal suffering, terrible calamities. For example: "May nine demons take you!", "May you hang yourself from a dead branch!", "May your tongue not fit in your mouth!", "May the spring's first thunder kill you!"

Some examples of Lithuanian curses:
Po simts geguciu! O tu rupuzgalvi! O tu zalty prakeiktas! Tu avigalvi! Tu parve koja uzpakaline! Tu suns kumpi! Kapladanti! Lisk tu vabalo blauzdon! Eik i pekla, molto minti! Eik sunu, sukuot! Kaip tave sventa zeme nesioja! Suk tave devynios! Kad tave perkunas be zaibo trenktu

We'll have to get Riuka to translate!!!
 
Speaking of Hostile... here's Hostel part 2 : The Women
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hQJXH0-sx2E
 
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