New Film: Keygen!

WhiteWood

Carbonite Member
BACK WITH ANOTHER ONE!

The First DRACTION (Drama/Action) Film From WhiteWood Entertainment;

KEYGEN

The Story Of An Android With An Illegal Past Turns Into An All Out, Rapid-Fire, Self-Exploding, High-Speed Chase As She Makes Her Way Towards Not Only HERS, But The Freedom Of All Mankind!

Directed By Tommie Green.
Starring Bretony McGee, Sara Freer, Chad Dougherty & Brad Maggetti.

ENJOY!
(Runnig Time- 8:41)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=87oKLK2-AgM

n501869264_130774_1445.jpg

CLICK HERE to see the full KEYGEN photo gallery of edited stills!
 
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hey man, that was pretty neat. Obviously you worked with what you had and in the end made something that was fun to watch!

I applaud you on the time spent on the little effects, but be careful that you don't overdo it. I say this simply because, as lovely as the effects were, they were overused, and sometimes didn't make sense. For example, at the beginning, when she's running from the car as the man shoots at her, the bullets all explode by her feet suggesting that either 1) hes trying ot make her dance as she's running, or 2) he has horrible aim, neither, of which im guessing you are trying to portray.

The sound of the guns could have been a bit more dynamic. Although you are using one specific sound for both guns, you could play wit htheir pitches and Eq'ing them to create two guns that sound different from one another.

Acting was... well, lets just say it allowed me to focus on the visuals of the story :)

Thanks for posting!
 
hey man, that was pretty neat. Obviously you worked with what you had and in the end made something that was fun to watch!

I applaud you on the time spent on the little effects, but be careful that you don't overdo it. I say this simply because, as lovely as the effects were, they were overused, and sometimes didn't make sense. For example, at the beginning, when she's running from the car as the man shoots at her, the bullets all explode by her feet suggesting that either 1) hes trying ot make her dance as she's running, or 2) he has horrible aim, neither, of which im guessing you are trying to portray.

The sound of the guns could have been a bit more dynamic. Although you are using one specific sound for both guns, you could play wit htheir pitches and Eq'ing them to create two guns that sound different from one another.

Acting was... well, lets just say it allowed me to focus on the visuals of the story :)

Thanks for posting!


Yeah, the acting wasn't good. I'll admit. But I feel strange directing actors who aren't really 'ACTORS', these are just people who want to be in films. I don't believe these characters can potray what I want to see them do, so I don't concern myself with that as much.

Also, by the bullets hitting the ground by her feet, yes, I was trying to suggest that the androids have bad aim.
 
pretty cool man. alot of good shots in there. i particularly liked the one where the guy and girl are fighting on the rooftop and she is getting back up from falling. i dunno, something about it was just nice. i agree with the "acting" comment before, a little more enthusiasm from the other femal actor (not the main) wouldn't hurt. maybe you could raise their voices a little when the two girls are talking, too. in one scene it went from really quiet talking with my speakers way up, to guns firing really loud lol.
 
Audio Syncing

Audio Syncing

pretty cool man. alot of good shots in there. i particularly liked the one where the guy and girl are fighting on the rooftop and she is getting back up from falling. i dunno, something about it was just nice. i agree with the "acting" comment before, a little more enthusiasm from the other femal actor (not the main) wouldn't hurt. maybe you could raise their voices a little when the two girls are talking, too. in one scene it went from really quiet talking with my speakers way up, to guns firing really loud lol.

If you listen to what I'm about to say before rewatching the film, you'll think I'm a great editor. In that hallway, the echo was SOOOO bad that you couldn't even hear what the person next to you was saying. I mean, look @ it! Sooo, I had to get the girls in a nice padded room and have them reaad every line again in my cam's mic and then cue it to their footage. And it was hard cause the audio in the halway was so bad that I could barely tell when the girls started and ended a word.

Now when u rewatch it again with this new eye/info, you'll probably think I'm a bad editor because the timing of certain lines are off by about two frames, which I had to sacrefice for the KEY WORD in that sentence being on point.
 
Ah yeah i remember the travails of dubbing when i had bad audio in my films...This is much better work from you than the rap videos i've seen, imo. Good job and keep it up!
 
Hey Tommie,

First I want to compliment you on some things I think worked very well in this short. First, your introduction is very well put together - we have this shot of a seemingly empty street with a pretty exciting musical track going for the opening credits. This makes the viewer curious about what exactly is going to happen, and really whets their appetite, so to say.

Secondly, your color correction is, for lack of a better word, pretty.

Third, there are some stylistic choices that I think work well, such as having the male androids silhouetted against the sun.

Now, I also have some criticism for you, and I hope you will take it as I intend to deliver it - with respect, dignity, and maturity.

The most obvious thing I want to point out is the recycling of the original soundtrack from "The Matrix" trilogy. Instead of just saying "Don't do it", I want to explain why you should not do this. One of your goals in making this short must have been to get attention as a young writer/director. The people who are in charge of deciding which directors get money and which don't are going to immediately assume a few things when watching this and listening to the music:

1. Your story is, in part, based on "The Matrix". This will make them think that you can not come up with an original concept or story on your own.
2. You built your scenes around the music, instead of the other way around.
3. You rely too heavily on the music to carry the action, hoping that the exciting music will distract the audience from the otherwise uninspired action happening on screen.

The dialogue, like the acting, is contrived and soulless. I don't believe a word of what your actors are saying, and neither do they.

Yeah, the acting wasn't good. I'll admit. But I feel strange directing actors who aren't really 'ACTORS', these are just people who want to be in films. I don't believe these characters can potray what I want to see them do, so I don't concern myself with that as much.

This is a cop-out attitude, and you're shifting the blame from yourself to the actors. When people see bad acting on screen, they don't blame the actor, they blame the director, and there is no way out of this for you. I highly reccomend you pick up a copy of "Directing Actors" by Judith Weston - it has a chapter completely dedicated to directing "Non-actors". This is a failure on your part to come to the set prepared, and it shows me that you don't really know anything about the characters.

If you listen to what I'm about to say before rewatching the film, you'll think I'm a great editor. In that hallway, the echo was SOOOO bad that you couldn't even hear what the person next to you was saying. I mean, look @ it! Sooo, I had to get the girls in a nice padded room and have them reaad every line again in my cam's mic and then cue it to their footage. And it was hard cause the audio in the halway was so bad that I could barely tell when the girls started and ended a word.

Now when u rewatch it again with this new eye/info, you'll probably think I'm a bad editor because the timing of certain lines are off by about two frames, which I had to sacrefice for the KEY WORD in that sentence being on point.

ADR is a standard technique for any video production, whether you're shooting a concert, a short film noir, or a $80 million Hollywood summer action flick. It does not make you a great editor - great editing does.

Finally, the opening sequence with the FBI warning and copyright statement - I don't understand why this is here. Honestly, if I saw these on a Youtube video (especially recolored) with no preconceived ideas of what I was about to watch, I'd think it was a comedy or spoof of some kind.

Andy
 
If you listen to what I'm about to say before rewatching the film, you'll think I'm a great editor. In that hallway, the echo was SOOOO bad that you couldn't even hear what the person next to you was saying. I mean, look @ it! Sooo, I had to get the girls in a nice padded room and have them reaad every line again in my cam's mic and then cue it to their footage. And it was hard cause the audio in the halway was so bad that I could barely tell when the girls started and ended a word.

Now when u rewatch it again with this new eye/info, you'll probably think I'm a bad editor because the timing of certain lines are off by about two frames, which I had to sacrefice for the KEY WORD in that sentence being on point.

Well, a couple of things about that scene . . .

The framing of the android girl -- she's way off to the left, with all the space behind her. It gives the impression she's talking to someone who's behind her, but we know the other person isn't -- and with the other person framed with space in FRONT of her, it's jarring and confusing.

Also, there's a line cross -- a cut to the other side of the actresses about 2/3 of the way through the shot -- doesn't appear to have much good reason for doing it, and it's needlessly jarring.
 
1. Who performed the music? It is very high energy.

2, Did you use a wide angle lens (.75x or .6x) most of the time? Either that or the 2.35:1 letter box hides the deep DOF. Just curious.

All the comments above. I still enjoyed it.
 
Using The Matrix Score.

Using The Matrix Score.

The most obvious thing I want to point out is the recycling of the original soundtrack from "The Matrix" trilogy. Instead of just saying "Don't do it", I want to explain why you should not do this. One of your goals in making this short must have been to get attention as a young writer/director. The people who are in charge of deciding which directors get money and which don't are going to immediately assume a few things when watching this and listening to the music:

1. Your story is, in part, based on "The Matrix". This will make them think that you can not come up with an original concept or story on your own.
2. You built your scenes around the music, instead of the other way around.
3. You rely too heavily on the music to carry the action, hoping that the exciting music will distract the audience from the otherwise uninspired action happening on screen.

Man, yeah. I figured those things. Man, I just grew frustrated. I was listening to scores online for TWO DAYS after I shot the film. Just nothing but browsing scores from pros, newbies, etc. And after something led me to The Matrix scores, they all just SOUNDED like The Matrix and I'm like 'I can't use these, I'll get hacked for it'. So I chose the score from The Matrix that LEAST sounded like The Matrix. The one in the film. ('Cause you know every other score in The Matrix has horns blowing everywhere and this wierd repetitive drumming sound).

BUT, ALL of my doubts FLEW out of the window when once I imported the track and began editing,
EVERY SINGLE SCENE went PERFECT with the music!
I couldn't UNDERSTAND how every single move in my film was timed perfectly with that track ALREADY. It's like it was MADE for me.
-The instant escalade in the track when the female throws down the bomb, when the android first sees the laptop in the hallway, when the Android sfirst start shooting at the female on the roof.
-From the ding that plays when the rock hits the Android on the shoulder
-The symbols that sound when the Android doesn't see the female behind the wall
-The two 'DUN DUN's' that sound when the two Androids reviel themselves on the roof when the female is hiding
-How the music stops when the female takes her last punch into the Android... I could go on and on. I couldn't say no to it. I didn't edit around the score as much as you think.
 
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Why I Didn't Direct The Acting

Why I Didn't Direct The Acting

The dialogue, like the acting, is contrived and soulless. I don't believe a word of what your actors are saying, and neither do they.



This is a cop-out attitude, and you're shifting the blame from yourself to the actors. When people see bad acting on screen, they don't blame the actor, they blame the director, and there is no way out of this for you. I highly reccomend you pick up a copy of "Directing Actors" by Judith Weston - it has a chapter completely dedicated to directing "Non-actors". This is a failure on your part to come to the set prepared, and it shows me that you don't really know anything about the characters.

I have to disagree with you on the dialogue being souless. I think the WRITTEN dialogue is perfect (Let us not forget, it's between an Android and a Genius). But I DO agree with EVERYONE on the acting. Maybe I copped out on not directing the actors. But I stick to my reason. I'm not going to sit and study and stress myself trying to get a perfect performance from someone who isn't even a real actor/actress. If they come to the table acting like that, I say '**** it' just like they said '**** it'. However, if they were proffessional actors and gave me REAL perfromances, I'd direct them into delivering each line PERFECT JUST because I KNOW they have the ability to.
 
Framing Of The Actors

Framing Of The Actors

Well, a couple of things about that scene . . .

The framing of the android girl -- she's way off to the left, with all the space behind her. It gives the impression she's talking to someone who's behind her, but we know the other person isn't -- and with the other person framed with space in FRONT of her, it's jarring and confusing.

Also, there's a line cross -- a cut to the other side of the actresses about 2/3 of the way through the shot -- doesn't appear to have much good reason for doing it, and it's needlessly jarring.

I know EXACTLY what shot you're talking about. I threw that shot in there ONLY because the timing of her dubbed dialouge didn't sync with her lines on the footage. So I needed a shot of her that DIDN'T show her talking and I JUST used to the shot of the Creator (Female in the dress) And didn't want to drag her shot on any longer. I was concious of that when I threw it in there as well.

ALSO, I know EXACTLY what you mean about the space behind the Android girl. That girl is my girlfriend and we were watching it and even SHE asked me 'Why is there so much space BEHIND me'. I want to create an excuse, but I can't. I know that I know better than to shoot like a 'tard, but for some reason I did and there's no justification behind why I did it... I just did by mistake & Not paying attention. I didn't storyboard that part yet.
 
Music & Aspect Ratio

Music & Aspect Ratio

1. Who performed the music? It is very high energy.

2, Did you use a wide angle lens (.75x or .6x) most of the time? Either that or the 2.35:1 letter box hides the deep DOF. Just curious.

All the comments above. I still enjoyed it.

The Music is from the chase scene from The Matrix Reloaded. (The 2nd one). And who are YOU telling?! I think that the Matrix is the best scored film of all time! (imo).

And I don't want to say what I did to achieve the widescreen, but I will because all criticism is positive on here:
All I did was unconstrain the porportions of the film and bring the HIEGHT of the video down to 60%. LMAO! (So yes, the actors are crammed shorter, but if you didn't see the fullscreen version, you could never know... well, now you might be able to)

Here's why I don't shoot widescreen with the CAMERAS widescreen option: Because it simply puts black bars ON your footage... Why would I want that? I did it once for my mock film 'Kill Will' and it leaves you with absolutely no OPTION to full screen it. Thus, you can't play it in theatres. (Cause they're projection machines converty widescreen films automatically). And the only way you can get it out is to extend the hieght, but you'll know extended height before you'll notice shortened hieght anyday (imo)
 
as a good tip;

next time you find yourself with a static dialogue scene, try and spend to time to work in motivated blocking. As is, it seems like two people in a hall saying words at eachother.
 
So I chose the score from The Matrix that LEAST sounded like The Matrix. The one in the film. ('Cause you know every other score in The Matrix has horns blowing everywhere and this wierd repetitive drumming sound).

BUT, ALL of my doubts FLEW out of the window when once I imported the .

I am curious, did you get licensing for that score or just snatched it? If you don't have legal permission to use it you could get in trouble... Cause posting on U0tube is alreay considered commercial exploitation (geese listen to me I am starting to sound like a bloody lawyer)

So I watched the film, it took a long time to load up on U-tube but I stuck it out :)

My comments are the same as most everyone...

I LIKED:

The two androids
The fight scene
the floating circular movements around actors during chase scenes
The LOCATION (white hall etc...) what was it?
I especially liked the androids pointing their guns together, made for a pretty shot.

I DID NOT LIKE:

the fake bullet richochets and fire coming out of guns because they did not look real enough to be convincing and to me brought the level of film down quite a few notches. I would rethink things and use something else...

the fake sound of firearms (sounded like a video game)

the edits in the conversation scene

the performance of the two female actresses. I think the performance might have been better if scene was blocked differently

the very strong shadows / contrast on the roof top made it impossible to see the actors face at all in many shots.

THINGS THAT DID NOT WORK FOR ME

the car chasing the girl. the car sounds like it is going very fast (screatching tires, engine RPM up, yet the girl is running faster than the car. Ok so maybe she is an Android and super fast yet she did not seem that fast when compared to the street stationary items (poles, buildings etc...). It seemed that when the car turns the girl is just a few feet in front of it, yet the next shot she looks pretty far ahead.... So I guess to me there was inconsistencies there. But I pay attention to details and most people don't.

I agree about FBI warning seeming out of place.

ABOUT WORKING WITH NON ACTORS

I find that non actors can sometimes give you a better performence than actors. Some need more work though so you have to take more time to go over the scene and performence with them. You can't just go "of what the heck they are not real actors" and throw them in front of the camera :) and hoe for the best or walk away LOL you need to guide them through it and invest a bit more time than real actors. I have got some amazing performances from non actors (sometimes a couple Bloody Maries helped LOL) and some pretty crappy ones from real actors (go figure)

ALL IN ALL

I think you have really good elements, I would go back and work on it a bit more to take it to the next step. Maybe reshoot the conversation but do some serious rehearsing first?

PS: What did you use for the floating shots? They were cool.... :)
 
I'm gonna say try to say something that hasn't been said...
Your vision was very clear. It bordered on neo-american cyber-punk (i just made that up), and with your budget, I think it came across nicely. Yes, the acting was stagnant; yes, that's your fault; yes, blah blah. Look, you created something- clean it up and make another run at it. These guys and gals are all right, but if you are listening to every single word they say, or even reading this post, you're not shooting, and that's just a travesty.

However,
Never work so hard on a look that you forget the scene...

But what do I know, I'm a junior member
 
1. if you wont even try to get performances out of amateur actors, what makes you think you'll have the opportunity to work with professional actors?

2. don't steal copyrighted, famous music. it's lame, no excuses. trust me every freshman in film school can drop the matrix soundtrack onto their video and get the same results as you.

3. your video is painfully cliché.
 
How I Did The Rotation Shots

How I Did The Rotation Shots

I am curious, did you get licensing for that score or just snatched it? If you don't have legal permission to use it you could get in trouble... Cause posting on U0tube is alreay considered commercial exploitation (geese listen to me I am starting to sound like a bloody lawyer)


PS: What did you use for the floating shots? They were cool.... :)

As for the score, yeah, I soo just snatched it. (Keep that on the hush though, lol)

And as for the rotation around the actors, I used a storyboard, a dvx, and a steady-ass hand. (Not only do I use that shot alot cause I love it, but I shot that take about 3 times in the alley to get it perfect. Without a steadycam, that was as good I was going to get it, but maybe I should invest in one seeing as I do it so much.
 
Poo Poo?

Poo Poo?

I have to disagree with you on the dialogue being souless. I think the WRITTEN dialogue is perfect (Let us not forget, it's between an Android and a Genius). But I DO agree with EVERYONE on the acting. Maybe I copped out on not directing the actors. But I stick to my reason. I'm not going to sit and study and stress myself trying to get a perfect performance from someone who isn't even a real actor/actress. If they come to the table acting like that, I say 'poo poo it' just like they said 'poo poo it'. However, if they were proffessional actors and gave me REAL perfromances, I'd direct them into delivering each line PERFECT JUST because I KNOW they have the ability to.

Did they SERIOUSLY turn 'f u c k' to 'Poo Poo'? Aren't we grown here?
 
Neo-American Cyber-Punk

Neo-American Cyber-Punk

I'm gonna say try to say something that hasn't been said...
Your vision was very clear. It bordered on neo-american cyber-punk (i just made that up), and with your budget, I think it came across nicely. Yes, the acting was stagnant; yes, that's your fault; yes, blah blah. Look, you created something- clean it up and make another run at it. These guys and gals are all right, but if you are listening to every single word they say, or even reading this post, you're not shooting, and that's just a travesty.

However,
Never work so hard on a look that you forget the scene...

But what do I know, I'm a junior member

LMAO, Nice phrase, I should quote it and put award leaves around it on the flyer. Which by the way is right here:
n501869264_130995_5067.jpg
 
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