The Company of Memories

My biggest concern turned out to be the least of my worries. I used my three wheel diy dolly to sweep across the room and my actor fades in and out several times. You see where I am going with this? Well, the 5 passes came out so close to exactly the same I had no trouble editing them together.
Now back to editing.
 
Nice. Editing? Are you wrapped with the shoot?

Happy New Year! I've been away for that last 2 weeks!

I hope all is well!

-Ted
 
This sucks!!!! My cylinder icon appeared two seconds after I started shooting this morning! I think I got the shots I was going for but I'm afraid I didn't. Now I have to find someone in the Austin area who will do work on my cam.
Wish my luck.
 
Hey WIF, how is everything going?

I couldn't help but to think of you when we were shooting our ambulance scene.

I can't wait to see this "prequel" to AfterLife!
 
Really not a happy camper right now. I need a couple of shots, I think I may have gotten them but my camera won't play them back for me and I don't have a deck, to finish the edit. I have music done. I lucked out and got a great song and I'm really excited about having it in the film. Even got a laptop so I can edit while at work on the ambulance (while I'm not running calls) but I've nothing more to work with. Arrrgh!!!
So here are the details I have been carefully vague about.
It takes her leaving to wake him up to the reality of just how much she means to him. It takes her leaving for him to realize how much of a part she plays in his life. It takes her leaving for him to go after her and try to get her back.
The film is based on a letter written in 2002 at the request of a friend of mine who wanted me to write a "love letter." I had written several papers for a class and she had read them and really liked my writing style. So I wrote her the letter.
When the idea for a drama came up, I started thinking about different ideas. It occured to me how songs are really just little 4-5 minute dramas set to music. Then I remembered the letter I had written. I had to re-write it in more of a screenplay style and then we had to storyboard and everything else.
We brought Mike Sorrles from After Life back as our lead. Then I thought what the heck, let's just make it a prequel to After Life. The female actor in this is not the same as the girl in the car from A. L.
This film is much more intimate than A.L. I keep the camera much tighter and the location is almost entirely in one apartment. Several techniques are employed to convey a sense of the passage of time, a certain despair, loss of hope, recollection of passion, intimacy...everything in the film is intentional and has some meaning behind it.
I hope you will all enjoy my second effort. I am greatful to those who viewed and comented on After Life.
 
Hey guys. I really liked how this started off. It felt like it was going to move into a complete narrative. It kind of fell flat for me when we went back into something like a love letter or a post card.

I honestly wanted to see a complete narrative out of this, and I understand your constraints and such. Good job on getting it done, either way!

Thanks for showing.
 
Really liked the different lighting designs - gave you several different "looks" which really helped sell the many different chronological checkpoints you hit. Bringing the blue mug back into it as an echo was nice - though I was happy with just the sink echo.
I also think you did a great job of signaling the transition to Act II by losing the music - definitely communicates that we've passed through an intro of sorts.

I'm with the previous poster who didn't like what the film became once it went into the VO parts - I don't like to critique based on comparisons (felt too much like...reminds me of...), but the script was definitely way overdone for my tastes - even for a love letter (a few lines esp. jumped out at me - I can send details if you like).

Since you were trying to evoke the things we remember after someone leaves, I think you nailed the sensory nature of what comes into our minds. Love the shot of the boiling water, and of your actress just after the bell pepper cutting shot...knew exactly what you were going for.

The acting worked fairly well (though kind of bland from a male lead who was supposed to be so articulate, sentimental, and agonized) - but it was key that you didn't have either of them really delivering the lines from the letter.

Overall, the visual element was excellent - but some other key elements of storytelling missed the mark. Thanks.
 
"you always had my heart". talk about a cliche line.

great light setup on the outside shots of the girl.

the sex scene reminds me of desperado. great lighting.

i don't get the ending.
 
I don't usually read other critiques before I offer mine but as I type this I cannot but help to see your response above.... and that answers a big question that I had. "The whole thing is cliche and she comes back in the end."

I thought that the cinematography was the stand out feature of this film. The lighting and the camera moves were beautiful. I especially love the candle-lit bedroom scene. Wonderful.

As for the story, I kept saying to myself, "why are these two people not staying together?" There love for each other seems so prevalent. I hated that she was leaving him. I guess she didn't after all, huh!

Nice job with this film. The acting was real and wonderful. The VO work was nicely done. I did feel that there could have been a little bit of reverb on her track. (I don't know, just hit me when I was listening. I thought how nice it sounded and then I heard her voice and thought it was a little dead. But I am being picky here.)

I love the lacing of the story with the coffee cup. Well done.

One camera move that I didn't feel that you needed was the dolly in on the cup. I don't know, it hit me as unnecessary. It's just a choice.

Again, beautiful craftsmanship here. I really like your work.

Bravo!
 
I feel the cinematography is the strongest element of the film. I like the dutch angles with the guy on the couch :) You've got a lot of nice, smooth dolly shots that make this feel like a big production. (How did you do the dolly shot at 2:17 behind the sink??)
 
i liked the beginning the acting was good, although not too sure on the 'coming back' does that really happen in real life????? ahhh this is a movie, right! ;)
 
Purely subjectively, the score annoyed me.

Stand out shots – the candles and the wine. Nice cinematography.

V.O needs a rewrite? I think so. The sentiments and premise are good but the V.O was a little flowery.

Your actress did an admirable job.

Btw – love your dvx- user name.

:beer:
 
This was really well shot and lit. I particularly liked the pan of the couch and the various shots of him being restless and how the couch from fade to fade maintained its position. Perhaps too much camera movement. The zoom on the cup wasn't needed. I feel that just the reveal of his hands leaving would have worked better.

The acting was pretty good, especially the female lead. The guy was a bit cold but I guess that was his character. I felt he could have been a bit more remorseful during the voice over. I kind of liked the VO. I guess a lot of people didn't. I liked how it went from him writing it to her reding it. I think the fade between his audio and hers during that part could have been a bit longer. It seems kind of abrupt.

The bedroom scene was nice and touching.

The one thing that bugged me the most was the last shot. A real quick close up and a barely audible, "Eric." You made that pretty girl look horrible in that shot. Not the best way to end your otherwise touching short.

Good luck and keep up the good work.
 
Thank you all for your comments. There was supposed to be more for me to choose from in the editting, but the camera quit early on during filming on the last weekend of shooting. So the final scene of her was pretty much all I had. Wasn't my favorite shot of her.
Word of advice on candles, a room full of them gets hot in a hurry.
The shot over the back of the sink was done with my skater dolly on the counter top. The sink is in an island.
Audio continues to be my weakest point. I do feel the audio was more consistant in this than my last film entry.
The actual letter is actually too short for this story. Hence the long pauses during some of the scenes.
My personal favorite part is the couch. I used the skater, shot 5 takes and welded them together.
 
Will,
Ok I watched it twice now. Your skills are waaaaaaaaaaay sharper now. You've grown on this film, I'm proud of you for that homie! Loved the couch scene where time overlaps, that sh!t was HOT SON! lol Every dolly shot that I saw I was like damn, that DIY dolly he made is paying off, they look great. Dude, you have to send me a link of that "her on top" scene uncut! LOL The bedroom scene was probably the best looking shot/scene out of the whole fest, it just looked amazing and sold me. The story wasn't doing it for me. I learned to dislike any VO from my last two shorts and whenever I hear VO I almost puke, lol. I think the worst thing about your film is that damn zoom in shot of the mug on the sink. haha

Anyway, Will, keep it up man! The films get a BIT easier as you go on and you're just growing like a weed dude, rapidly!
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top