New Short (also set in england ^_^) filmed on SG35

danm

danm

Active member
Hey everyone,

This was a university project. I am looking to work on it for another month and then submit it to some festivals. There are some issues to sort out, in the coming month we'll be doing a re-record of the music and a finished sound mix. The music is an original score written and performed by Todd Howe of the The Boxer Rebellion (www.theboxerrebellion.com)

Any comments or suggestions would be very useful now. If anyone is a good colour corrector (not magic bulleter) I'd appreciate some help to get a few shots matching up better.

I am incredibly impressed with Wayne and the SG. There are certaintly shortfalls but the compromises are worth taking. I had to write an 8000 word critique on the film which if you really want I can post somewhere. One of the interesting realisations from using the SG35 was how the shallow depth can really save you money.

Anyway - I hope you enjoy the film and come up with some interesting suggestions!

Kit used - DVX100a + SG35, Lighting kit, Rowe CIne Dolly, Stickypod, etc.

http://www.mediafree.co.uk/solofilm.html
 
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Pretty impressive shots in there mate. I saw some of your stills posted previously and thought the same. The SG35 really did a good job, although at this res lots of things look good (not saying it wouldnt larger - just hard to tell). Seriously dont over cc it, what you have done works, the scenes flow and it suits. Stick with what you have.

The soundtrack under this compression was also difficult to pick apart.

Just my humble opinion on a couple of things. Dolly shots looked great, very smooth but the left to right to left dolly felt over used, just because you could also the tilt shots became cliche. And in a couple of shots for example when he is walking over a dune and you are focused on the grass in the foreground, it didnt feel comfortable to me to keep him out of focus the whole shot, I would have pulled focus on him after the first second.

One last thing is the story whilst abstract was not clear.

Anyway just my opinion, and as you know the perceptions of every person are different.

Overall the shots were outstanding.
 
You have some gorgeous images there. The shots of the sky were stunning (
did you use a filter for those?) The kid cycling by the water was also a beautiful shot. I agree with ncje that some of the camera movement shots were overused. Also some of the exposure settings didn't seem to match up. Not being critical though because I really enjoyed the film. Very well done.
 
I thought this was brilliant. One of the best pieces as a whole I've seen on this site. I would try to match up the exposures but that's it. Your images are gorgeous, and the subtle lighting is perfectly suited to this short. I kept thinking of Lynne Ramsey's Ratcatcher. Really, really nice work. Compositions are thoughtful, and nicely balanced. I thought that you used your focus as a subtext as well as just a production element and that was a nice choice too. Please don't over CC this piece! One thing - get a high res bigger version of this up - it deserves it!
 
wow man. That was absoutely breathtaking in terms of images and framing. I love that piece. The composite shots were a little distracting sometimes ( i believe you used composite for the skies? )

could be wrong though. What kind of lights did you use for this piece? Because i know there are always issues with light loss with these adapters but yours seemed to come out grainless ( even though it was low resolution )

Clap clap clap. Really showing off the dvx's potential in the film making market.

Congrats.
 
Trying to watch it now, but keeps stopping on me. Also, from what I've seen so far there may be some compression issues, but the shots are otherwise quite breath taking. I'd really suggest, unless you want feedback on story/editing only, that you post some higher quality files that folks can right click & save as, to watch uninterrupted on from their systems.
 
great images. compositionally sound for the most part. certainly could use some sound work though, agreed.

my only beef is with the music. it seemed over-scored to me. and the main theme lacks personality. it sounds very generic. perhaps if the instrumentation was different. i know you didn't make the score, but i don't think it does the piece justice at all.

the "blinking" matte at the beginning seemed a bit out of place. i'd be interested to hear why that's there.

really nice overall though. should certainly get into some festivals. and i agree with acoreasc that a larger version should be posted.
 
Excellent work!

I'm sure you want to hear some criticism before your final draft so here it is as it came to me:

Leave the dolly of the books out. The only thing it tells us is what the camera is moving behind in the next shot, otherwise it's useless information. Plus I think the colors are a little too vivid and throw off the color treatment in the rest of the film. It would be nice to see the dolly movement with a rack focus from behind the books to the boy, and I think that would be sufficient. The only reason I would use the books is if you are showing the boy interacting with something from that angle.

When the boy drops the sand the reflector is waving quite a bit, but this will not bother many people.

I didn't think you overused the dolly shots, but I think your speed was consistent and too fast in some spots. It would have been nice to see it mixed up with some really slow crawls making it very subtle.

I'm really interested on how you light your close up shots of the boy and the sky behind him. The clouds and his face are exposed just right.

NVM I found your other post: "I'll be doing that last after I've dabbled with shake to replace most of the overcast skies."

The dolly on the breakfast table shot should not start from standing still, it really looks unnatual and pulls me out of it a little. It would be good to see a dissolve maybe? And I would say the same thing going the other way. Just copy and paste your same footage and slow down one track so you never fully see the dolly stop before it dissolves into the second idetical footage overlaping dollying back the other way. I hope I make sense.

I would be really interested in downloading a full res version.

It would have been a really nice shot to see the boy run into frame and then go close up on his hand as the plane leaves his grasp. He just makes a throwing motion as it is and I think have the plane in there would have added a lot.

My favorite shots are the Low Angle Close Up shots of the boy with the clouds behind him right before he sees the dead bird, and the boy looking out the car window with the reflection passing by.

Great original score!!! I think everyone involved in your project will be very proud to have this piece of art in thier portfolio even if you decide to make no changes however... I have to say that the story seems a little vague, but my god the visuals are amazing! I think If you were to work with what you have a little more and possibly even go out and get a couple more peices to the story you could have a real winner here.

It would have been cool to show the boy make the plane to look like the seagals and then try to fly with them through his plane. Maybe even attach a line to it like a kite to give that connection. I would have shown seaguls floating in the wind. You know how they hit the wind coming off the ocean and just hang there for hours.

I find it kind of funny how you used baby chickens and then they turn into seagals but I understand why you did this. You have a lot of seagul sounds, but not a lot of seaguls, more seaguls please.

What was your original synopsis?

I would have changed your story around so the boy is alone (I would develope his loneliness more), he finds a friend in these hatchlings, they grow up fast and fly away. Now I would intruduce the boy and his plane. The goal of the boy building his plane is to be with his bird friends again. He builds the plane and makes it look as close to a seagul as possible. In the middle of his plane making I would show him watching the seaguls flying. Also It would be kind of cool to have the boy tie a red piece of yarn around the baby chicks leg, so when the seaguls are in the air he can pick out the correct bird. Obviously you would not be able to tie a piece of yarn to a wild seagul, but using some kind of motion tracking you could sure make it look like it.

Great stuff danm...damn, go win some awards

-Kevin
 
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I am rendered speechless by this short. There's always a way to criticize something but I feel this isn't the time. That was an amazing short.



Right when I reached for the SG35, Wayne yanked it away -- he stopped selling them.

So I settled for a Letus.

I will be getting the SGPro, soon.
 
absolutely breathtaking. i had goosebumps when the credits came up.

the kid was great. gorgeous colors. beautiful feeling to everything.

this is by far the best stuff i've seen with a cheaper adapter.

did you shoot in squeeze mode, and subsequently letterbox the footage further in post; it looks like 1:2.35 anamorphic. i saw a bit of vignetting in the shot i think where he is on the bridge or something.

the audio you should be able to fix.

six stars out of 5!!!
 
Just want you to know I'm not knocking it Zac. I think Dan is asking for our criticism before he makes the final draft so it can be as good as possible. I tried to give as comprehessive analysis as I would have wanted, especially because I think he has a real chance to win some awards.

At this point I could only wish to create something as visually stunning as this, and I would be happy to come close, but my intent is to help not hinder. I realize It's easy to criticize, and very hard to go out and create.

One more thing for anyone reading this or Wayne when he chimes in...

What are the main diffenences between the Letus35 and the SG35? What makes the SG better in your opinion. What makes the Letus better? Can anyone post a link to any side by side comparisons done? Is there going to be an SG35 for the HVX?

Also Dan what do you like about the 70-205mm macro f3.5 Vivitar lens vs the nikon and cannon's? Is the vivitar the only lens you used on this short? And how did you connect the vivitar to the FD mount?
 
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I REALLY enjoyed that! It's so simple, but there's so much to it.
How in the HECK did you get some of those sky shots? Were they composited or did you just get really lucky that day?
 
Kevin,
Please refer to the 35mm adapter shootout dvxuser article for an SG/Letus comparision. Unfortunately both SG and letus test units had a few problems, so the test footage on the shootout is very poor.

The SG35 (now SGpro) and letus have different looks to the footage they produce. The letusFLIP looses more light but gives an image the correct way up, the SGpro only looses 1/2 stop of light but is upside down. Also, the SGpro comes with a 15mm rods support system with sliding plate.

There is great footage out there from both units, I think it comes down to personal choice at the end of the day.

Important thing regardless is using the adapter properly and creatively, which Dan has certainly done.
 
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I'm not sure why the end differed from the beginning, but to me it did.

The dolly shots ALMOST seem excessive in the first half, disconnected, and then when you arrive at the outdoor locations on bike (where the boy's riding to the beach) the camera action becomes a part of the story. I became interested at that point.

The visuals are pretty darned decent, though. Especially the sky shots, as mentioned before. Are they real? Or composited?

Also, what settings did you use for this? (if they haven't been mentioned yet.)
 
My Thoughts & feedback

My Thoughts & feedback

First let me say, I always watch the video first, and then give my feedback and "opinions" before reading any one Else's. This way I am not slanted one way or another by other's comments. Let me also say, I have over 14 years of Video and Tv experience but mostly, my inborn talent and skill. bla bla bla...

*From a Non Technical view (or my wife's viewing style) "Very moving. First Armature movie, film or production that moved me that much." I think I'm getting too much estrogen in my McDonald's Big Mac. Or it could be because I related very well with this in many ways. When I was young, about 5 years old, and before Video was around for the average user, my father created a Slide Show using me as the subject in a very, VERY similar story. When I get a chance I'm going to remake that story on the DVX100!! But enough boring stuff.....

**From a Technical view point.
_*-The Good points:
The shots were composed very well. The framing and composition was really good.
The color was good. The Actor was very good.
Nice Dolly Work.
Good Lighting.
Good Sound.
The timing was right on with almost every shot and it flowed well.
It pulled you into the story and you started to forget you were analyzing the video.

Ok...Now the Techie advise...for what it's worth.

The Dolly Shots were good, but looked a little over used. I know even for myself it's tempting to over use Crane and Dolly Shots. But just remember in Hollywood they will spend all day setting up a crane or dolly shot, another day shooting it with 10 takes, and then when it's all said and done the shot lasts about 3 seconds in the film. But it's like Sugar, you need just enough to make it taste right. Too much and Ewwww.

Next. The "CREATIVE" shots. It really all depends on the "TYPE" of video you are making. Obviously a music video may not hold to this. But. I think in a video of this nature it does. Although "Creative" and artistically framed shots look great, again, before not to over do it in too many places. The one shot that comes to my mind was when the child was on the beach walking and looking for his airplane. You had a low shot with focus on the grass up close, and the child walking was blurry. Nice shot in some places. But to me it just didn't feel right. Maybe had you racked focus at some point in the shot it would have "FELT BETTER."

*Sound

The Sound track was great! Perfect for this. And although this type of video was driven by the sound track, I think you could have spiced up the "real world" audio of the activity just a bit.
The one scene that comes to my mind is when the child throws his bike down you can't really hear it. My mind expected to hear the bike "crash" to the ground. Or the first shot of the boy walking in the woods. You could hear the Birds in the sound track, but you show him walking in the woods over sticks and leaves but you can't hear it.

And I know it's always easier to critique others work.....but....
Last..The Chickens. The first shot you can't see that they are sitting in a nest. They are framed so you can't see that they are sitting in a nest. You then show later the empty nest with feathers. I'm sure this was due to the fact you had to keep the chickens there and couldn't show where they were really sitting or being held by. But still.

And last, last....my personal opinion on the opening of the video. Nothing wrong with it, but I didn't like the letter box slide. But that's just my own personal taste/

Over all, VERY GOOD WORK!!!!
 
Thanks for all the feedback everyone.

BergVision + Kevin your feedback is incredible. Not just in wordcount but in detail! Your comments on the narrative are very useful and interestingly enough some of the ideas were originally planned. The launch of the plane was originally going to be much bolder and iconic. The kid was going to be running with the plane, and the plane was going to be soaring above him teathered by some string.... WELL.. the plane didnt fly. It just nosebombed. Rather gutting really, especially seeing as I spent sleepness nights, can of stella in one hand, plywood in the other getting high off the bolsar cement.

No chicks in Feb + No chance of a re-shoot = chicken chicks. Ideally it would have been nice to get hold of some gull chicks. I had to shoot between the 3rd-7th of Feb so certain compromises had to be made. My lack of experience showed on the beach scene which should have been a 2 day location instead of just the 1.

Berg I'm with you on the sugar. You gotta treat it like a good meal - keep things in balance. Luckily short films are more of a snack so I can get away with a bit more crap hehe

The FD lenses used were ;

28mm 2.8
50mm 1.4
135 2.5
Vivitar 70-205 3.5 - with macro

The vivitar's a stunner and is FD fit by standard. It's one of the sharpest lenses and the zoom + macro gives you more freedom to search for the ideal composition. Wayne knocked me up a lens support for the vivitar overnight and sent a day before the shoot. I only had the adapter 2 days before filming began, cutting it a bit fine but I guess it says something about ease of use.

These comments will certaintly have an impact on the final edit. Thanks again.
 
i dont know how young you are but for a student project this is very impressive. Great pace, great music, lovely touch not seeing the parenst faces, some beautiful lighting and framing and blur and the boy is fab.
My main criticims would be:

1. dont repeat the behind books dolly
2. shorten the section by the motorway esp. the opening tilt down
2. too many repeats of the grass filling frame shots at the end
3. overall story goes downhill a touch, could use some more clarity and impact

but as a director you have achieved the most important thing and that is get a very strong tone to the film, a level of realism and believability and chiefly a very engaging feel that draws the viewer in very strongly. If I am brutally honest, most clips i see on this site i never really bother to finish watching (same is true of many short films in fact) but this had me glued to the end. If you can put together something like that with such finesse, grace and beauty at your age then i'd say you have a pretty damm good career ahead of you. There was a lot of emotion in that film, maybe in part because it personally touched me and my memories of me as a boy, but regardless of any singular identification I may have with it, no doubt about it, you have created something with a lot of feeling. Bravo.
 
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