Format when keeping a character's identity secret

JasonFox

JasonFox

Internet Sensation
If I want to keep a speaking character's true identity a secret until later in the script, do I just give him an alias? For instance, say I have a man who always wears black. He ends up being the central villain in the plot, complete with name, etc. However, early on he's more mysterious, like Cigarette Smoking Man in the X-Files. Can I just call him Man in Black to start with and then switch when his name is revealed, or should I go ahead and use his name, but not give any other description? And should I drink yet another Diet Dr Pepper?

Fox
 
Wether it's right or wrong, that is what I do, and it has sort of bugged me. I always thought there had to be a "preferred" method.
 
It's probably just based on preference. There's not much point in hiding it from the person who reads the script, but if you want to keep the reader immersed, then it's worth doing.

I do it using your method as well - the name changes when I reveal the character, otherwise it's a mysterious name based on some aspect of the character I want to go with for the time being.
 
Much like you do. I just keep the name generic, until they decide to reveal their true self. Man, Woman, Man In Black... If the viewer or reader wouldn't know who they are yet, you shouldn't give it away.
 
The way I've seen it done is this:

MAN IN BLACK
​
So, I see you've discovered my secret identity.
​
HANK
​
That's right, I now know that you are none other than the notorious Steve!
​
STEVE (MAN IN BLACK)
​
Drat!
​
HANK
​
Wanna go get a taco?
​
STEVE
​
Sure.
​
It's correct to indicate in the screenplay that the audience does not know the identity of a character. It's easy to overdo this though. Use it with caution, only when making a point of concealing an identity, and don't hesitate to remind readers about it later to avoid confusion:

When Hank's back is turned, Steve, AKA the Man in Black, pours a vial of greenish liquid into the taco sauce.

People read scripts quickly and it's good to make their experience as effortless as possible.

-Stu
 
Stu - Thanks. Makes sense. I'm doing my best to keep everything as streamlined and easy-to-follow as possible. Hence this question. Which I declare solved! Thanks, guys.

Fox
 
I recently wrote a script that had a character we knew by one name, then later we learned he had a different name. Once the second (true) name was revealed I used both names separated by a slash (e.g. MARK/KYLE) both in the action lines and in the character line to identify the person. I used the new (correct) name before the slash and the original name after the slash.

Just a formatting thing, I guess, but thought I'd offer it anyway :)

If you ever want feedback on your script, give me a holler

Peace,
Larry
 
Frankly I think trying to trick the reader in a script is not the way to go. If you want to write a story or a novel ok but for a script just use the normal name . Most likely it will get changed eventually, if not the person breaking down the script for production is not going to put you on their gift list. Keeping the characters name a secret should happen in the dialouge and action, not the character name.
 
I agree with what has already been said, although where the previous posters have recommended, for example

STEVE (MAN IN BLACK)
​

I would personally write

MAN IN BLACK (STEVE)
​

To establish the change of name, and then just use

STEVE
​

from then on. I think establishing the original name and following it with the new name helps the reader follow the before-after nature of the switch.

I do think it's important for the screenplay to reflect the final product somewhat, so if someone's identity is part of the mystery/revelation in the film, make it that way in the script.

However, if your character is a dude who appears on the scene to save the day, but you go 20 pages before anyone bothers to ask what his name is, and then he says Mark, I don't think it's necessary to withhold his name from the audience. That part of his identity is not really a big turning point. In that case, I'd introduce him and refer to him as Mark in action and dialogue headings, and just remember that the eventual viewing audience will only know what you say aloud.
 
DorkmanScott said:
I do think it's important for the screenplay to reflect the final product somewhat, so if someone's identity is part of the mystery/revelation in the film, make it that way in the script.

However, if your character is a dude who appears on the scene to save the day, but you go 20 pages before anyone bothers to ask what his name is, and then he says Mark, I don't think it's necessary to withhold his name from the audience. That part of his identity is not really a big turning point. In that case, I'd introduce him and refer to him as Mark in action and dialogue headings, and just remember that the eventual viewing audience will only know what you say aloud.
Click to expand...

Maybe while your trying to sell the script but the shooting script should not have name changes. The people reading it are not your audience. It's probably preferable to have the actor playing Steve to know from the top that he's the Man in Black.
 
Noiz2 said:
Maybe while your trying to sell the script but the shooting script should not have name changes. The people reading it are not your audience. It's probably preferable to have the actor playing Steve to know from the top that he's the Man in Black.
Click to expand...
The character playing Steve will know that because by the time he's been hired, he will have read the script. The shooting script to SCREAM, for example, didn't have the killer's name on every page where the killer appeared, even though the killer was an existing character who was revealed at the end.

That brings up a note, though. If you have a mystery character who is actually a character we already know, I don't think you need to do the parenthetical thing at the reveal. Example:

MAN IN BLACK​
It's time you understood who you're dealing with.

​
He takes off his black mask to reveal STEVE!


STEVE​
And now you know the truth.​

At any rate, one shouldn't be concerned with how to write the shooting script until the production actually moves into the shooting phase.
 
Not that it matters, but I believe in the Kill Bill screenplay, the character is "The Bride" until her identity is revealed in the story.

Also, as I have always seen and as is practiced by my screenwriter and a working (TV show writer) screenwriter who is a friend - the name in the script is who we know it is. Like Kill Bill.

If I have four pages of dialogue with a dead guy laying on the ground, but we dont know who he is, he is referred to as "dead guy". When it comes out at the bottom of the thid page that it is Jimmy-Joe, then he now becomes "Jimmy-Joe" in the script or "Jimmy-Joe's body". Same for living characters.

KAILA enters the smoky bar. Sitting at the bar is JENNA, her younger sister and a older man, clearly passed out. In the corner sits a quiet loner.

KAILA
Jenna. Enough. I wont watch this any more.
 
Not that it matters, but I believe in the Kill Bill screenplay, the character is "The Bride" until her identity is revealed in the story.

Also, as I have always seen and as is practiced by my screenwriter and a working (TV show writer) screenwriter who is a friend - the name in the script is who we know it is. Like Kill Bill.

If I have four pages of dialogue with a dead guy laying on the ground, but we dont know who he is, he is referred to as "dead guy". When it comes out at the bottom of the thid page that it is Jimmy-Joe, then he now becomes "Jimmy-Joe" in the script or "Jimmy-Joe's body". Same for living characters.



KAILA enters the smoky bar. Sitting at the bar is JENNA, her younger sister and a older man, clearly passed out. In the corner sits a quiet loner.

KAILA
Jenna. Enough. I wont watch this any more.

QUIET LONER
Leave her alone. She's a big girl.

KAILA
Shut up. Mind your own business, freak.

JENNA
Leave Max alone. He's trying to help.

MAX
Yeah. Leave Max alone.​




....and.......scene.

Dont ask me why the "quiet loner" is so outspoken. He just is. It's the fatal flaw in my screenplay. (Yes, I made this up for the example.)

BUt that is how I have always seen it done and how a couple writers I know do it.

I dont know if it matters, though.

-GageFX
 
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