PANDORA - Presented by Envision and Waltind

Norm Sanders

Norm Sanders

Script Wrangler
pandoratitle.jpg




Temporary link to WMV file of the film (will have the perm. QT and/or WMV links up soon at www.eefilm.com/pandora - please right click and save this file to your desktop to view): www.eefilm.com/test/pandora-final.wmv




Thank you for your comments & great feedback, and hope you enjoy the film!!


Special thank you to all the cast & crew that helped make this happen! We hope they've enjoyed the experience,
and would look forward to the opportunity to work with any/all of them again!

When the festival judging has closed, I'll update this front page with a link to the final, full cut of
PANDORA: The Awakening (8.5 minutes).

PLEASE NOTE: I want to be clear that Ryan Walters (waltind) was a significant partner in this production. The cat is
VERY organized & professional in his interaction with others, and was the DP on this, in charge of both A & B cameras.
I think we made a pretty good team, and want to stress the word TEAM on that. He'd be responding more, but he's
neck deep in a paying gig in Germany right now, and won't be back 'till next week.

Also, Chris Rojas, of RMI Studios, put out some great results with the score, as well as did the final stereo mix for us
clear on the other side of the country at his NYC based studio.

Some low res. screen grabs for before/after examples ....
pandorapost.jpg
 
Last edited:
One of the best films I have seen so far! I thought the acting was real good overall. The only thing I felt was the ending left me hangin' too much. Fuller review later, my time on this internet terminal is running out!!! GOOD JOB!
 
Thanks Brandon, glad you liked it ... especially the part about the acting, as that's the part I'm most nervous about ... at least with regards to my own performance. Not sure I'll ever try to tackle THAT again; being the lead while trying to direct/co-direct.

It's supposed to leave you hanging to a degree, yet still have some resolution with regards to questions UP TO that point. Kind of a stair step progression of questions until the flash back sequence in the warehouse, where hopefully most of the viewers questions are answered (i.e. Who's Nikki? What happened to her? What are these guys working on and what happened?, etc.).

Ideally, it's either a compressed first act of a longer feature film, or the first of 2-3 shorts that act as sequels to this. As such, we're titling the DVD version (8.5 min cut with two additional scenes) PANDORA: The Awakening.

Look forward to a fuller review when you have time, and hope you have a safe flight!
 
You guys had a good offering. The sound and music played well with the pictures and I thought you guys had some good effects. I thought the acting was pretty good, too. The only quibbles I had were: 1) if I was Dan, she would be dead (but I'm not Dan
thumbsup.gif
) and 2) I thought it was a little too easy for her to take Dan down, he just stood there and waited. Minor quibbles for a good project.
 
Thanks, Blaine. I can see why those would stand out. Ideally, it was to come across that this is a group of people that had worked very closely together for weeks if not months prior to things unfolding. Dan, being the oldest, has a natural paternal character to him, and Kelly's become like a daughter to him up to this point ... things that can't be fleshed out appropriately in 6 minutes while fitting everything else in.

Not disagreeing with what you said, as I'm sure others may question the same thing ... but there's some very quick backstory for hindsight purposes. Wish we'd had the time to go into the relationships more, as this was intended to be more of a character driven piece.

Again, thanks for the feedback. It's greatly valued.
 
Yep, some good acting in there. Looked and felt very professional.
If I had to quibble over something it would be the "Sci-Fi channel Movie-of-the-week" vibe I got when the girl touched that gizmo.

Overall though, it was cool!
 
Envision said:
Thanks, Blaine. I can see why those would stand out. Ideally, it was to come across that this is a group of people that had worked very closely together for weeks if not months prior to things unfolding. Dan, being the oldest, has a natural paternal character to him, and Kelly's become like a daughter to him up to this point ... things that can't be fleshed out appropriately in 6 minutes while fitting everything else in.

Not disagreeing with what you said, as I'm sure others may question the same thing ... but there's some very quick backstory for hindsight purposes. Wish we'd had the time to go into the relationships more, as this was intended to be more of a character driven piece.

Again, thanks for the feedback. It's greatly valued.
Click to expand...
I understand, thanks for the clarification.
 
I liked the performances and the DPing was nice, but to me the music just TRAMPLED all over the film! A good score should essentially go unnoticed.
 
Trampled as in too loud compared to dialogue/SFX levels? Could you explain further? Thanks in advance for the time, ZombieSquid, as well as making the initial post in the first place. :)
 
high production value, way to go. Could def be on the sci-fi channel (take that as you may).

I think the sound problem is the volume, it takes away times becaus it is too loud. I really liked it, but crank down the track a little. Certain points border on comical or soap opera-ish instead of dramatic because of the volume.

Loved the line "Just Do it" good energy, well placed.

Good acting on the overall, the beginning was a little rough for me, but I think that it was because this is part of a larger piece. I'm guessing that a lot of dialogue had to be cut, and the lines you did choose were essential to understanding the story, therefore a little trite and less engaging than a full conversation, which is a shame that the full thing isn't here.

Nice job on the director/actor work, it's hard to do both.

Overall nice work, one of the better half up so far.
 
Thanks Hybrid ... both you & Zombie mention the music, and I believe you have valid points. In this case, I'm guessing, since the final mix was handled by Chris Rojas, who was also the composer, he probably was leary about pushing back the music too much since it was his baby & wanted it to shine/be noticed. It was probably a tough position to be in, and one I can see could happen to anyone in the same scenario (cutting the volume on their own piece, etc.).

When I first heard the mix, he'd wondered if the dialogue needed to be brought down a couple notches, and I said absolutely not ... if anything the music may be a little hot throughout ... but I didn't want to push that too much as he was doing a lot with regards to the mixing and scoring, and wasn't a paid employee. Like everyone that's in this fest, I'm sure there's a balance they've fought with trying to push through their creative decisions, while still respecting & appreciating all the work others are putting into it as well with zero compensation.

Oh, and Hybrid, the coffeeshop scene wasn't cut in dialogue ... it's about how the script was. I just hate when dialogue is fake & too expository, but perhaps I went a little too far in keeping it lean?

On a different note, the one thing I've not heard anyone comment on was the ADR. The ENTIRE coffeeshop scene was ADR as the BG noise was horribly loud (had a loud refridgerator we were fighting) ... it apparently sync'd up & balanced fairly well, if no one has noticed.
 
Norm,

Thanks for this film - I enjoyed it very much. My comments and thoughts , in no particular order are:

I liked the location of the coffee shop. Of course, the first thing I thought was "I wonder how much that cost? Or did they know somebody?" These contests have ruined me.

Springing off your last post, I did notice the ADR in the coffee shop (which, I suppose, one isn't supposed to notice). The reason was that I had been fighting with the ADR on my own entry, so I noticed that you'd done ADR and then noticed that yours was better than mine.

I did like the music and didn't think it was too intrusive at all. Nicely done and I wouldn't change the mix at all - except perhaps in the flashback scene when the dialogue got a little buried.

I thought the acting got a little "Wonder Woman-ish" when we got to the lab. Sorry. And yes, Dan pissed me off when he wouldn't shoot Kelly (he'd pistol whip her but wouldn't shoot her? Now THAT'S caring!). And as Dan is dropping to his knees and we see his right hand, he lost the gun that was there a nano-second before (but no worries - he get's it back a second later).

And where did the second (?) gun come from. One minute it looked like Dan was about to blow his own head off, then suddenly Mike is awake and hauls off a crack shot - with what gun?

And I thought the eye effects on Dan's eyes were great.

Thanks very much for your efforts and again I enjoyed this short very much.

Cheers.
 
yeah, good job on the ADR then.

it seemed a little lean, perhaps specialize it a little for the story, esp. the first three lines, they sem really general, but clarificiation does come ... it's a tricky choice.
 
Dahopafilms said:
And yes, Dan pissed me off when he wouldn't shoot Kelly (he'd pistol whip her but wouldn't shoot her? Now THAT'S caring!). And as Dan is dropping to his knees and we see his right hand, he lost the gun that was there a nano-second before (but no worries - he get's it back a second later).

And where did the second (?) gun come from. One minute it looked like Dan was about to blow his own head off, then suddenly Mike is awake and hauls off a crack shot - with what gun?
Click to expand...

"Now THAT'S caring!" LOL!!! Though it's not seen on screen (screw up in hindsight with my editing - I take the blame) Dan actually does try to pull the trigger ... when the shots finally back on him we see him fiddling with the gun ... the SAFETY was on. By the time it's off, she's too close & all he can do is pistol whip her. Bottom line, however, is I shouldn't have to explain this, which means we should have had it more clear in the film.

Oh my goodness! I litterally had to go back & freeze frame that spot to see that the gun IS missing! What were we thinking?! Gads, what a continuity issue we missed. At least it's a quick one ... so quick that no one on our team had seen it before. Good eye.

The second gun was from Mike originally, when she made it across the room in lightening speed & broke his wrist ... when Mike shoots the orb, he's doing it with his left hand.
 
Glad I finally got to see it Norm.

Cinematography/Lighting-Some of the best I've seen yet. The coffee shop and house scene (when you're talking to the girl) look excellent.

Acting-Great job, there were a couple of rough spots, but a great accomplishment considering your other responsibilities. Compared to most, this also is a bit of a standout.

Story-The story was pretty decent. It's funny as I toyed with a similar idea. I had to watch it twice to get everything, but that's the case w/ alot of these movies. When it ended I wasn't thinking "Holy ****, that was a great story!", but I definately wasn't bored. Overall I think the story landed somewhere in the middle.

Sound-Very good, the music was a bit much at times, but the dialogue was crisp, etc.

I haven't read the other posts, so sorry to rehash if that is the case.
 
Sorry, forogt F/X:

The special fx were OK. Not great, not bad. There has only been 1 that I've seen so far that has better if that tells you anything.
 
Thanks Tim! Feel free to point out the "rough spots" with the acting. I'd really look forward to as much details as anyone is willing to give out, no matter what facet it's regarding.

Thanks again & glad you enjoyed it! Can't wait for Ryan to log on from Germany & catch up on this thread.
 
I agree with a few of the previous comments...I liked everything except the beginning scene. And some sound distortion...could be my speakers..not sure.
 
First of all, Chris Rojas of RMI is a GOD! I would KILL to have the chance to work with Chris on a project someday . . . now back to your requested critique . . .

Hey! You had some OLD actors! The big guy was GREAT! I totally bought him. In fact, all of your actors "looked" the part. And, the girl was hot, always a good thing. Now, the lab . . .

The good thing is that you had a large space. You're right . . . no wonder you thought I was bagging on your short in the other thread (I really wasn't--pure coincidence)! Again, a large space really helps. I did think it was lacking, however. If you didn't have the money to dress it properly, you needed to figure out a way to HIDE it better. Hanging cheap plastic frosted shower curtains all along the back walls, backlit sickly green, would've done the trick. Or creating a much more dramatic lighting design (to better"hide" what you couldn't afford to dress properly).
 
OOhhh, love the idea of the shower curtins with sickly green lighting. Shucks! Next time. Seriously, cool idea. More prep time would have helped, in the fact that we literally showed up to the location the day we were shooting ... no scout time.

Yeah, Chris did an incredible job with the score. Funny how objective people can be with all aspects of art (music, acting, lighting, etc.). Some will love something, while others didn't.

Thanks for the comments, NBC!
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top