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    Director Mod jpbankesmercer's Avatar
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    John, been away back now and your film was high on the list to watch.

    Not going to harp on any of the pervious comments. Its great to watch you develop your chops, pushing your limits and proving your not just a one trick pony.
    I've always loved your CC, the baseball shot on the father (second shot) IS sublime. I loved what you did with this film and feel sad its been flushed from your harddrive. Every bit of work (even my terrible ahh ahem early s*%t attempt, 'Zombie Waffle') does its job by telling you what to keep doing and what to stop doing. I admire your constant commitment to the filmmaking process. its a long journey for all of us, good to see you striding out front.

    P.S. great use of sound transitions and I thought the oldman was super.

    Jp


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    Just finished the short.

    Havent read this lengthy thread.... these comments are a mix of technical/creative crits and I'll keep it short n sweet

    CONS
    - some of the audio has wind clipping (baseball scenes)
    - there are some tripod shakes/bumps (saw several of these)
    - the audio in the hospital sounds really off/hollow/not believeable
    - the color correction just doesnt work and feels amateur
    - I feel like this story was pretty good, would work better if it werent crammed into a short film
    - oh and the music that accompanied the phonecall was.... typical

    PROS
    - some of the camera moves and shot comps were nice
    - the acting wasnt too bad
    - overall the short shows potential for you as a filmmaker, keep working out your chops

    if you're reading this as too harsh and insulting, thats really not my goal..... I'm being honest and trying to help you get an outside perspective on your work.

    cheers man.


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    Senior Member arielman's Avatar
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    Hi John

    Really liked the open shots of the Father and son scenes . The smile on the fathers face as he played ball with his son was great . You had me here.
    I felt once in the hospital you lost me .Some how I felt the Young father fell short here BUT the Sr Did a nice job !!! I think it was the tone of his voice that did it .
    As for the ending ..it just didn't work for me . I did like how you shot it though .
    I think if the Father showed some more emotion while talking to his dying father this would of got me .
    Kudos to your son , he fit the role very nicely.
    Ian


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    Retired Moderator J.R. Hudson's Avatar
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    Thanks Ian

    Your thoughts seem to echo throughout the review on Dissonance, and I have to agree with the general sentiment.

    In hindsight, I should have only had my son at the end of the hospital bed as well.


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    Senior Member Michael_Petro's Avatar
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    This was an interesting short. and what do I mean by interesting you say? well i will tell ya..

    all the technical stuff has been talked about already soo I will tell you how it made me feel...

    Some of the scenes made me fell happy and sad at the same time which to me is very interesting.
    Michael Petro
    Jacksonville, FL
    I am not a serious filmmaker, I am however serious about making more fun movies.


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    Retired Moderator J.R. Hudson's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jpbankesmercer
    John, been away back now and your film was high on the list to watch.

    Not going to harp on any of the pervious comments. Its great to watch you develop your chops, pushing your limits and proving your not just a one trick pony.
    I've always loved your CC, the baseball shot on the father (second shot) IS sublime. I loved what you did with this film and feel sad its been flushed from your harddrive. Every bit of work (even my terrible ahh ahem early shi* attempt, 'Zombie Waffle') does its job by telling you what to keep doing and what to stop doing. I admire your constant commitment to the filmmaking process. its a long journey for all of us, good to see you striding out front.

    P.S. great use of sound transitions and I thought the oldman was super.

    Jp
    Thanks for the encouragement Jp !

    Im going to keep preessing forward in my quest !


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    Mr. Hollywood Blaine's Avatar
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    Comparing Hudson to Scorsese and Tarantino? I find it hard to believe that he woud be influenced by those hacks...


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    Really nice lighting in the hospital scene! John, don't you have any making of photos showing lighting set-up? Thanks


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