I still think we need to have a category for "Best Death" There were a lot of people who were happy to see me get shot in the head...
Thread: Metal Storm - Echo Productions
Results 71 to 79 of 79
06-14-2006 07:39 AM"...and knowing is half the battle. The other half is violence..."
06-15-2006 06:27 AM
This was another favorite film of mine this fest. High points (there are many) include the intention (not execution) of the music, the excellent lead actor, the SUPER POWER (I mean, this is herofest and this guy is maybe the 2nd or 3rd to have an interesting, well-defined power and effect), and the visual look of the cast and cinematography.
This film was kinetic, fast-moving and exciting - shooting the car-chase and intercutting with flashback kept the film from dragging, a good choice for pacing.
Weaknesses? A lot of sound. Like many visual directors, I think you neglect sound and its potential to help your film. FX sounded stock, actors vocal performance was lacking. The doctor was probably the worst offender in this regard. Remember, if you make a good-looking film with poorly recorded sound, you've made half a film.
Wondeful effort, see you next fest.
-BenRed 143 - Viva Jannard!
06-15-2006 06:45 AM
Thanks for the honest critique, Pen. Actually, super THANK YOU! The biggest thing we wanted to take away from this fest since it was our first was to get as much feedback and reviews as possible. We really need it to help shape our future projects.
I agree with you, the potential for cool sounds in this film would have really enhanced it. We played and played with all kinds of different stuff, we just didnt' have the best tools to use.
Please, for the love of all that is metallic and stormy, keep these reviews and crituques coming. I've been told I was the worst actor in many of these reviews I've read, and I still love them, becuase we want the feedback.
I agree with my line delivery, I'm hiding behind my previous post about the VO issue still, but if it needs improvement, it needs improvement.
We originally had an idea to use rapid and echoing voice overs during the flashback scenes instead of dialog, but in the end we stuck with the dialog. Do you think the VOs would have worked better?
Thanks again!"...and knowing is half the battle. The other half is violence..."
06-16-2006 03:23 AM
Loved this flick.
My only main complaint, it was so powerfully driven... I think I needed more of a payoff in the end. Maybe our hero and villan squareo ff in another parking lot next to a huge metal structer like a storage warehouse or something. Instead of stealing the gun from the villian, he uses his magnetic personality to pull down the entire warehouse crushing our villian. To expensive to pull off I guess. But I think I needed something big like that.
Some major hum or background noise in some dialogue...
06-16-2006 05:16 AM
OK, After a bus ride to work and thinking a while about this I know what I want from this film.
I want to believe that there could be some chemistry between the female doctor and the magnoman... I want to see that relationship be developed better. Almost like the story of a female attorney, who helps spring her client from jail after loosing the trial and now they are both on the run from the law.
I want the villian to have a boss, who's face we never see. This is who the villian is calling and reporting to all the time. In the end, though the villian is dispatched, his boss has some omnipresent kind of power or simply watches what has transpired from a distance. That Dr Evil type kind of boss who you never see, except for his hand stroking Mr Bigglesworth. OK, not the right example, but a serious version of this. At the end, the boss says something to the effect of, 'You can run all you want magnoman, but you're never going to find sanctuary. I won't stop, until I've made you mine.' That leaves us hanging and sets us up for future adventures.
And yes, I've decided how I'd like to see the villan die. The car chase takes the through an industrial complex. Perhaps there is a crash or something causes them to pull over. The villan gives his speech. The wind has picked up and is howling through the complex. Dust is kicked up. Things are blowing around. Behind the villan in all the trumoil we notice the rivets on the metal structure are coming undone. A Stop Sign has been shaking wildly and a closeup reveals the screws are slowly coming undone. Magnoman powers are in effect. He's slowly working his magic. Just as the villan is squeezing off his shot the stop sign breaks free, flies through the air and cuts his head off. Too late though, the woman is still shot. He dying words are run, magno, run.
Then the big boss delivers his closing line and we realize. This guy is gonna be running forever.
Suddenly there are dozens of men in suits and cars arriving. And the chase begins as the film closes. So the end, is really a beginning...
Then maybe hire Don Pardo from SNL with a closing VO "And so the adventures of magnoman begin! The story of how a little magnetism can get you into a lot of STICKY situations!" OK, well maybe that should left out.
Did you ever see the AWEFUL film 'Powder?' You should, just as a reference.
Oh, and I loved the music. I didn't mine the synthy stuff at all though I'd love to do a remix...
Last edited by Texture; 06-16-2006 at 05:47 AM.
06-16-2006 05:57 AM
Hee hee, Tex, I'd love to give you a copy of the original script and the idea I had for this as a series. Everything you've just said is all pretty much in my series concept for this film.
If this film had won first place or got a lot of buzz or interest from the fest, we were thinking of turning it into a short series possibly. Time is probably our biggest constraint from doing it though. But I'll reveal a *little* bit about the concept.
As far as the villian is concerned, you are right. The agent is just that, an agent. He's a pawn and a servant to a bigger entity. There is a large corporation that has tons of investment capital in all kinds of areas. Latley they've been delving into the medical sciences. The villan and the doctor both worked for this corporation (much to the doctor's guilt as I hope was conveyed) and they call the shots. No one knows how they got started, how they have so much money, and who runs the company.
The original script had a fight at the end between the agent and Martin, with the agent figuring out what Martin's power was. Martin was starting to walk towards the agent with that "It's on, I'm gonna make you cry to your momma" look, and the agent takes a few more shots with the gun, only to have the bullets deflected and have Martin hold up two fingers and stop one right at his forehead. The agent sees the magent power, so he takes a 2X4 and begins whomping on him, pins Martin down on the ground, does his evil speech before he delivers his final killing blow, and then a gun shot is heard. The agent falls and behind him is the female doctor, with gun in hand.
So now that he's got powers, and she's killed one of the agents, their bond forms quickly when they realize that they will now be on the run. I had a whole 30 second to 1 minute of dialog between them about them talking about running away together, what their plan was, and Martin telling her, "With all this power I have now, the thing I'm still attracted to the most is you." They hug and then hear some static over the dead agents phone that more men are coming to the scene, tons of agents. So they jump in the car and drive off. The doctor asks Martin "Where are we headed?" He replies "North." She asks "Are you sure?" He says, "Yes, trust me, I'm sure."
That's the pilot. The series would have each episode of them running, but with a purpose. Each show they track down someone else with a strange power that's been experimented on by this corporation. They help that person each episode, and find out a clue about the corporation each show. Then on the season finale they break into the corporation and discover something that changes the series totally (I can't tell you what it is, but it's good.) and the season finale ends with Marting being captured and the female doc being taken away for the "most important" experiment. The 2nd season premiere picks up right where we left off, with some even more cool stuff happening (again, can't tell you what)
This is my problem. I'm no good at writing shorts. My mind takes off too dang quick and I can't narrow it down. mjmcneese threw out the idea for "Magent Man" and within 48 hours we had a 15 page script that could have been turned into a pilot in another day.
Even with horror fest, a cool idea came to me, but by the time I was done, I had turned it into another television show. It would take more than 6 minutes just to set up the story.
The main reason we weren't able to do more with the ending was time. We stuck to the 5 minute rule, and by the time the extension to 6 minutes was announced, we were all done with shooting and had everything toned down to 5 min.
I really appriciate your input and feedback, it's so encouraging to know that someone else shared the same ideas and potential that we had for this concept, you have no idea. You totally made my week! Thanks so much, honestly."...and knowing is half the battle. The other half is violence..."
06-16-2006 07:30 AM
Sheesh, you're orignal ending sounds even better. I wish you guys had the time to massage this. But I guess we all have to work for a living. Dang that day job!!! But without it there would be no bucks to make the film.
Still, I'm not sure if you should call this the end of this project. It sounds like you have a lot of great ideas for it, but the short could definitly be tweaked gosh, you're like 90 percent to perfection.
I like the corporation concept. Sorta like the mystery company in Alien or my favorite the mystery administration that operates the island in The Prisoner.
You should see 'Powder' before you continue...
06-19-2006 07:50 AM
Tex, I like your ideas, and REALLY appreciate the constructive criticism. Like has been said, this is our first movie, and we learned a lot about the whole process. A big lesson was in how humble we have to be with our ideas. What I mean is that a $0-budget 5:00 movie can only do so much. We had some grandiose ideas about all kinds of metal destruction, but we never came up with a way to do it for free
We might not be 100% done with this, but I'm super proud of it.