Thread: The Captive

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    #21
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    Love the concept -- I think its a perfect arc for a 6 minute film. The majority of the cinematography was great too -- had a very consistent gritty feel, and really worked for the story. For the amount of time it sounds like you had for producton design, the set looked really nice. I liked some of the acting, but thought that some of it was overacted and didn't quite fit the gritty-ness. The cast definitely had the right look though, and that did a lot. Oh and very small thing here -- the font used for the title looks like a very standard font from FCP or something, and I think if you used another one it would have set the film up better moving on from the title sequence.


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    #22
    Member Amir Assasnik's Avatar
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    I enjoyed watching this film. The gritty atmosphere and sound design created a great backdrop to the short. My only critique right now was at certain points in the film the dialog and action sequence seemed out of sync. When the women first spoke to the man I was just lacking depth to me. Overall it was a great piece and I enjoyed watching it.


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    #23
    Senior Member dwyz's Avatar
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    This hasn't a little bit of that xfactor thing going on, can't quite place it, but I assume it's all the little touches that overall deliver something interesting.
    Good work on this.


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    #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by zucked View Post
    Oh and very small thing here -- the font used for the title looks like a very standard font from FCP or something, and I think if you used another one it would have set the film up better moving on from the title sequence.
    The font was standard unfortunately, titling was the very last thing to be done, and I really didn't have time create or look for something good. However I have a very good design friend working on that and will be putting in a much better looking title! I have to take the blame for the acting. My actors are very good and well trained, however it was the strain of directing, keeping track of shots, and managing a lot of little things at the end of a 16 hour long shoot that just caused me to start loosing steam and get sloppy with when to say "yes... that's it let's move on."


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    #25
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    Very nicely done, the gritty feel was well executed but the thing that got me about this was who was fighting who, I don't think I understood what was going on. Maybe it was just me.


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    #26
    Senior Member taylormade's Avatar
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    Nice idea, but the execution left a bit to be desired. The lighting was inconsistant and the previously mentioned white walls didn't help. I think the story needed to be tighter. The guy and the woman said all they had to say the first time around. The second and third time got very repetitive. The ending let me hanging. Was there a point to this? The woman was begging for a little humanity and the guy wasn't going along. Then the prisoner proved him right by trying to escape and the woman ended up with a hole in her leg apparently as punishment for being stupid enough to believe in the goodness of man. The acting varied from very good to okay, partially because some of the dialog was a little flat. The over-the-shoulder shot where the guy is supposed to be diliberating and you can see the woman's mouth moving bothered me.

    A nice effort. With a little more story and some tighter editing I think you could riase the level of this short quite a bit.
    "If they move, kill'em!"


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    #27
    Senior Member Chris Messineo's Avatar
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    I really dug the story here. You kept it simple which I like. Does this man deserve to die or not?

    The film did have a cool gritty look to it. I love that opening shot, but I would do something else with the title - it's tough to read.

    Well done and best of luck in the Fest!


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    #28
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    I liked the story, but thought the execution could have been better. A good entry overall.


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    #29
    Knight of the Holy Order krestofre's Avatar
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    I am ok with ambiguity, but I needed a little more clarity to the story to really enjoy it. What was the significance of the references to the guy "changing"? I didn't have a good understanding of what was going on and that hurt the film in my opinion.

    I thought most of the lighting was good and stylized, but during the big dialog scene between your main actor and actress I would have liked a little fill light or at least a bounce on his face to illuminate him a bit more.

    Good job. Costumes and location were great and there were a lot of nicely composed shots.
    Chris Johnson


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    #30
    Senior Member Russell Moore's Avatar
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    I really liked the tone and look of this film. The acting was good for me, the dialogue was a bit repetitive during their discussion on what to do with the captive.
    Didn't see the twist coming which is always a good surprise.

    Well done, gritty realistic short.
    the writer formerly known as "Conlan Forever"

    Need a short script?
    Have an idea? Want to collaborate? Contact me.

    screenwriter75@yahoo.com


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