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    #41
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rodney V. Smith View Post
    Hey you made it in despite the challenges, so good on you. You still shipped and that's awesome. It's all a learning experience and its good that you're still passionate about it to want to keep doing it. Looking forward to seeing what your final product looks like.
    Thanks so much Rodney. I did learn a lot. I am already doing test shoots for the next short film project. I have a script, actors, 3d Modeler, music, title sequences, and some crew. I'm so ready to use what I learned on this one and do better next time!!! Cheers Buddy!


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    #42
    ScriptFEST Mod Chris_Keaton's Avatar
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    I don't know who this Murdoch is, so maybe I'm missing something. I get the feeling there is more to this than what we've seen. I did think it looked good and of course the music was good. I just wish I knew what was going on.
    Chris Keaton - Writer | Website | Email | imdb |
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    #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by Chris_Keaton View Post
    I don't know who this Murdoch is, so maybe I'm missing something. I get the feeling there is more to this than what we've seen. I did think it looked good and of course the music was good. I just wish I knew what was going on.
    You have NO IDEA Chris!!! lol
    So hard to put something out there KNOWING that NO-ONE will have a CLUE what is going on!!!! lol

    I had to choose between not entering at all....or just putting what I had ready and graded out there. (Less than 1/4th of the movie, BTW)

    I had wwwaaaaaaayyyyyyyyy to much time/footy to tell the story. (10 min without the last 3 scenes) So....I had to CHOP it, grade it, and call it good. (Even though it was soooo BAD)

    ....if only I had started with a good script in the FIRST PLACE!!!!!! (Any ideas where I might get some help with that?)

    It also couldn't have hurt if I had more than 2 weeks to complete the project!!! (so funny)
    Last edited by HHL; 10-31-2011 at 06:33 PM.


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    #44
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    3d modeler is THRILLED to be working with us on "End Point", btw...and if you'd like to see "Rev"....he was the police officer in this project.


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    #45
    Senior Member Sunk99's Avatar
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    What'd he hit the stick/branch at :28 for? Odd cut to the library - I expected her voice to continue explaining in a V.O. Showing lots of disjointed book text - I don't understand. The footage at 2:29. Her body position. I think that is the third time with the exact same position to where it looks like a clip repeated. The cut from the library to her sister at 2:40 - I'm lost. Not their house okay (don't expect the audience to know where they live) - door opens, the girl screams. What? I don't understand - sorry. Acting was fairly good. Cine was good.


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    #46
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sunk99 View Post
    What'd he hit the stick/branch at :28 for? Odd cut to the library - I expected her voice to continue explaining in a V.O. Showing lots of disjointed book text - I don't understand. The footage at 2:29. Her body position. I think that is the third time with the exact same position to where it looks like a clip repeated. The cut from the library to her sister at 2:40 - I'm lost. Not their house okay (don't expect the audience to know where they live) - door opens, the girl screams. What? I don't understand - sorry. Acting was fairly good. Cine was good.
    You nailed it on the head. Doesn't make sense...incomplete. TRUE'DAT. (No sarcasm...) I ran out of time because I started too late. I submitted anyway for the experience and I learned a lot. Thanks for taking time to give feedback. Cheers!


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    #47
    Senior Member ZazaCast's Avatar
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    I'll just use your own words. Glad you learned a lot & I look forward to seeing a complete film from you.

    Quote Originally Posted by HHL View Post
    Doesn't make sense...incomplete. TRUE'DAT. (No sarcasm...) I ran out of time because I started too late. I submitted anyway for the experience and I learned a lot. Thanks for taking time to give feedback. Cheers!


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    #48
    Senior Member Matt Harris's Avatar
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    HHL, I'm glad you stuck with it and entered something, it always helps getting feedback. You did have some great shots with your nifty little Sony and anamorphic lens,
    and i'm glad you nixed the interrogation scene. Your library scene was strong! next time, just keep it simple. You got a "legend", a haunted house, your daughters starring in the movie... all you needed was to have them find the "legend" in the library, then have them walking through the woods, they find the house, something scary happens, they run, and their dad saves them. Something like that, you know what i mean? Keep is simple! And I wanna see more lens flares when you rock that anamorphic lens. I love me some lens flares.
    Matt Harris
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    #49
    Senior Member Edgen's Avatar
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    So, watching the film about a girl in a library is probably as brutal as it is to actually sit in a library.

    I kept saying.. "Surely, they are going to get to the point and just skip the books and shelves and racks and books and back to headlines back to shelves..."

    and then "Shelves and books and more racks and protagonist thinking... Solving something? Studying? Big finals?"

    I'm not sure if there were some shots. "or a few couple 4-5 scenes" missing, but the story ended as clearly as the film started. Which, If you would have ended the film of the guy running out with a bat and a girl screaming, that would have at least been an uber short film that was interesting.

    I realize from your opening post you only had 18 days from deadline. that's fine and all. I just encourage you to really think about what a short film is and how to tell it. I see where you were going. (or at least I see where you were trying to go). But so much is missing that it just doesn't make for a cohesive story. Maybe I missed some important lines in those books? Maybe there was a perfect connection and explanation to the mystery that got cut?

    I encourage you to keep at it and explore your editing room floor. shave some fat down to a skin and bones and take a step back and ask yourself... "Will others outside my thoughts know what i'm trying to place on screen?"

    lookin' foward to your next entry.
    /j


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    #50
    cool little "title" Charli's Avatar
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    I'll give you props for using the library as a location. It was so long though in getting something going. I felt like I was reading a book, but unsure why. I know you didn't have much time, but one thing you can't cut is the story. In the end, I didn't get it. Again, kudos for library location which to me is better than an interior of a house. Just wish I could say I understood it or liked it. Next time, give yourself more time.
    "Imagination is more important than knowledge." - Albert Einstein
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