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    #61
    Senior Member Anthony Todaro's Avatar
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    Some great things going on in this. It's like a page out of some modern but lost Gilliam tale. I liked the oddness of the sound and it's general weirdness. My suggestions are to be careful with the timing of jokes. Too long or short and they fall flat. I wish there would have been a bigger crowd surrounding him for the very last shot. Also consider funny or brighter music, like an ice cream truck soundtrack or something happy. It will make it even creepier. Loved the close-ups and general look of it. Good work.
    SCRIPTFEST VII TOP 3 | THE MELT | WEBSITE | IMDB | EMAIL
    Wordsmith & Graphic Designer. Will work for credit, coffee and money.


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    #62
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    Quote Originally Posted by Joshua Brown View Post
    Hitaish, I'm glad you liked the bacon cooking. I was afraid that it was actually the weakest part in the whole film. I'm curious exactly which parts of that sequence made it so strong cinematographically for you.
    I thought the bacon sequence had a very textured feel that allows the audience to recreate their sensory experience with all the forms of bacon. One could really feel the peeling of the layers of uncooked soft bacon from the package and juxtapose it with the sizzling crispy bacon in the pan releasing the wonderful "essence"

    As well, the cooking reminded me of the opening credits of Dexter...
    Vimeo
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    #63
    Senior Member Susanne G.'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Joshua Brown View Post
    Awesome! I love that you enjoyed it "in a certain way". It certainly isn't mainstream comedy.
    Excuse me - I didn't mentioned it enough detailed! Certainly - this kind of humor was first class

    Susanne


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    #64
    Senior Member Joshua Brown's Avatar
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    Thank you to everyone who took the time to rate and comment. We didn't make it to the second round of voting, but this was my first entry after all.
    Thank you everyone and I look forward to seeing you again in a future fest.


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