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    #11
    Senior Member hansel960's Avatar
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    Dude, I liked this one! Very simple yet creative idea. Lots of humor. Well done.


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    #12
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    This was a lot of fun. It was unexpected and each time he pressed the button I found myself more intrigued to discover what would happen next. I thought doing this all as a series of web cams, where we never see the alternate world was very clever (well done Keaton).

    I especially liked your actor. He was very charming and he really did a great job of conveying his experience in these journeys and his overall decline.

    I also thought you did a fantastic job with the effects (both digital and makeup) - it all looked really great - he looked like hell in the end.

    The only thing that left me scratching my head a bit, was the ending with the Uncle. I'm not really sure what he was after and why (maybe I missed it), but I still enjoyed the overall ride.

    Well done.


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    #13
    Member Amir Assasnik's Avatar
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    Great job! I really was intrigued with the film. It had a great feel to it and makeup was well done. The only thing I was left scratching my head about the uncle in the end too. I am excited to see what comes next from you guys maybe a follow up to this?


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    #14
    cool little "title" Charli's Avatar
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    I seriously do not like actors acting by themselves, having said that, this guy actually pulled it off. So I'm giving props to how believable the actor made it feel and how believable the dialogue was for him. Fluid enough that it didn't feel contrived. So props on both of that. I also did not get the ending with the uncle. So that's the one flaw the script had. Still, high marks for this one.
    "Imagination is more important than knowledge." - Albert Einstein
    Portfolio of an Entertainment Blogger


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    #15
    Senior Member Matt Harris's Avatar
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    I liked it because it got creepy and dark and brutal as the short progressed, it really worked for me.
    Nice After Effects work. You know what might look cool? SUBTLEY adding a filter that emulates "blocky" low res webcam.
    Might look even more real. Digieffects has that plugin called Damage that has that effect.
    Matt Harris
    Director / Composer / Colorist / Motion graphics
    http://www.imdb.me/matthewrichardharris

    DVXFEST ENTRIES: GLASSJAW / CABIN / CLARA / THE SOLUTION / LAKE WICWAS / BACKFIRE
    BOUNTY ON A DEAD MAN'S HEAD / VACCINE / NO HORIZON / THE BOATSHED / CLEAR SPACE



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    #16
    ScriptFEST Mod Chris_Keaton's Avatar
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    Thanks everyone. I guess the Uncle thing wasn't a clear as I thought it would be.
    Chris Keaton - Writer | Website | Email | imdb |
    ______________________________________________
    Samurai ScriptFest: A Dream of Electric Revolution (1st Place)
    Suspense ScriptFest: A Clockwork Darkened(2nd Place)
    Trapped ScriptFest: Trapped (3rd Place)


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    #17
    Junior Member ROM-30's Avatar
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    I had no problem understanding the uncle ( I hope ). From my understanding, the uncle died and after being able to travel to these other dimensions, he figured out a way to set up a mouse trap to his nephew who he probably didn't like. He knew he nephew would go to this other dimension over and over. I noticed that he kept coming back injured so I knew something was maybe after him. At the end of the film. The uncle "hooked" him and was able to come into his dimension thus continuing his life once again. I might be totally off but that was the story that I was following


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    #18
    ScriptFEST Mod Chris_Keaton's Avatar
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    Rom, you figured it all out. He knew the kid would be smart enough to use it, but not smart enough to stop using it. His life's essence so to speak was being used to bring Uncle Sticks back.
    Chris Keaton - Writer | Website | Email | imdb |
    ______________________________________________
    Samurai ScriptFest: A Dream of Electric Revolution (1st Place)
    Suspense ScriptFest: A Clockwork Darkened(2nd Place)
    Trapped ScriptFest: Trapped (3rd Place)


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    #19
    Senior Member EditPhish's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ROM-30 View Post
    I had no problem understanding the uncle ( I hope ). From my understanding, the uncle died and after being able to travel to these other dimensions, he figured out a way to set up a mouse trap to his nephew who he probably didn't like. He knew he nephew would go to this other dimension over and over. I noticed that he kept coming back injured so I knew something was maybe after him. At the end of the film. The uncle "hooked" him and was able to come into his dimension thus continuing his life once again. I might be totally off but that was the story that I was following
    I'll start by saying that I'm not sure I completely got this ^ when I initially watched the film.

    My criticisms: It's hard for me to like webcam-based movies after enjoying the Dr. Horrible series, which was done so well (IMO of course). It's also a concept I think is hard to bring something unique to (but see my compliments too). The story seemed to be missing some important pieces for me that could have brought it all together more obviously... especially after reading the description above. It also felt like it went on just a little too long the way it was... using that time for more important pieces of the story might have brought the whole thing together better.

    My compliments: I thought it was a cute idea, and in fact did bring something unique to the webcam idea. I liked the effect of him turning the device on and vanishing in a poof of demon-like smoke... which seemed almost a bit of foreshadowing of darker things to come. The design of the device itself was neat. The lead actor was also very good... very natural and not at all forced.


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    #20
    Senior Member Shawn Philip Nelson's Avatar
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    Wow, I was surprised at the construct of this! Well done, though besides the obviousness of him teleporting, I didnt get the ending until I read it here. Now it makes sense.

    You should put this on youtube after the contest!

    Great makeup too!
    Formerly user 'shawneous'.

    "Every great idea is on the verge of being stupid."
    -Michel Gondry


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