I already have a vision of what I'm imagining this to look like, but I'm going to wait until I read it and see if I'm right. Looks pretty cool!
Thread: Candy - Noel Evans
Results 21 to 30 of 55
12-11-2008 01:33 PM"...and knowing is half the battle. The other half is violence..."
12-11-2008 01:42 PM
Hehe, I dont think it will really be what anyone expects. I think the poster really only fits one scene.
12-11-2008 02:22 PM
Hey, I said nothing about there not being a shoot out. :P
12-11-2008 03:41 PM
Good script over all. Lots of nice action pieces. Good characters. We simultaneously think that Candy is the baddest mofo chick on the planet, but also see her as a sympathetic character, which is tricky to pull off.
The only part that troubled me was that she left the apartment with her brother at the mercy of the thugs. That didn't seem like her character at all. Changing that would alter the rest of the script significantly, but as a reader that troubled me. Candy seems like the kind of person who would have figured out a way to get both of them out, or die trying.Chris Johnson
12-11-2008 03:45 PM
I agree... I was confused why she found it sufficient to lay him behind the couch while she went and locked herself in the bathroom and escape...
I feel like there could have been a better way to have James kidnapped so that Candy had more to do in that scenario then run and hide... and crash at a motel for the night.
In fact, now that I think about it more... I think a lot of her actions in the middle are unmotivated/confusing. Like, where is she going when she loads her gun and leaves James? And like, she steps out side... gets knocked out... and then they bring her back upstairs... it feels like there could have been something more dynamic going on there.Mike Manning
12-11-2008 04:37 PM
Thanks for reading and giving your thoughts.
12-11-2008 05:05 PM
I really dug it, Noel. Well played
I swear I though I was reading a lost scene from Sin City (¬¬compliment).
"You sound like a duck that met another duck and shoved the other duck up its arse. poo pooin painful."
I also plotzed over this bit of Action:
"The spittle now runs red" (very nicely said.)
12-11-2008 05:17 PM
12-12-2008 03:11 AM
Well done, good script well written. I agree some actions aren't with her character, but I would argue they are more real, as she needed to get out to fight another day, the only way revenge would be had. Good stuff.
Gets slightly confucing when she is talking and they are still discussing the guitar playing and I got slightly confused with which thug was where when one got kicked in the nads!