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    The Script - John LaBonney
    #1
    Senior Member John LaBonney's Avatar
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    Looking forward to your comments.

    John
    John LaBonney
    Director, Dam Short Film Festival
    www.damshortfilm.org
    john@johnlabonney.com
    (702) 769-5902



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    #2
    Nosey Penguin
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    I love it! Another great piece, John!*




    *For the record, I haven't read John's script yet. I simply posted this for two reasons: 1) To have the first reply on this thread, and 2) In hopes that John will comment in my thread with an equally kind remark.


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    #3
    Senior Member StefanHaynes's Avatar
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    Logline? What's the basic premise/setting?
    Quote Originally Posted by kylekmd View Post
    Why am I here now, on DVXuser? I should be writing. We all should be writing.


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    #4
    More Cowbell Pictures Michael Anthony Horrigan's Avatar
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    I had a chance to read the early draft. It was a very good read. I'm sure the polished version will be even more impressive.

    Best of luck, John!

    Mike


    MONSTERFEST : 4th Place - Sustained Excellence Award - WESTFEST: 3rd Place - THRILLFEST: 3rd Place


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    #5
    Senior Member John LaBonney's Avatar
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    Logline: An overenthusiastic writer goes on a crazy chase.

    I wrote a logline for the upload that's similar to this but I can't remember it exactly. I stink at loglines. Pee ewe.

    Early reviews of the first draft I sent out to friends were pretty brutal. Since then I've tightened it up considerably, from nine pages down to seven. I cut a scene and trimmed the dialog.

    I think I've got a unique premise for this script. I've always tried to take these dvxuser fests in a different direction. I mean they give you a theme and a couple of basics and let you loose on the world. So while others were making James Bond spy movies for SpyFest (and there's nothing wrong with that at all), I wrote a comedy and a mockumentary in addition to a spy thriller. I just like to look at the theme and try and come up with something different.

    Hope you like it! But please be brutally honest with your comments--I'm here to learn and refine my craft.

    Thanks,

    John
    John LaBonney
    Director, Dam Short Film Festival
    www.damshortfilm.org
    john@johnlabonney.com
    (702) 769-5902



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    #6
    Senior Member StefanHaynes's Avatar
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    Wow. A friend of mine is entering a script called "Writer's Block." The logline could have been interchangeable with yours. What are the odds?
    Quote Originally Posted by kylekmd View Post
    Why am I here now, on DVXuser? I should be writing. We all should be writing.


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    #7
    Senior Member John LaBonney's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by StefanHaynes View Post
    Wow. A friend of mine is entering a script called "Writer's Block." The logline could have been interchangeable with yours. What are the odds?
    It's been known to happen. I wonder how similar the stories will be? Now I'm really itching to read the other entries!
    John LaBonney
    Director, Dam Short Film Festival
    www.damshortfilm.org
    john@johnlabonney.com
    (702) 769-5902



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    #8
    Nosey Penguin
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    I wish I had allowed more to read my early draft for feedback, now I am a bit worried. I like the story and all but I have my doubts, it is like nothing I have ever written and is done in a complete different way. I guess we will see...

    Also, I, too try to take the theme and twist it up a bit. I think I kind of did that here. Good luck all!


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    More Cowbell Pictures Michael Anthony Horrigan's Avatar
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    Great work, John!
    As you know I thought this was pretty funny. It will be interesting to read what everyone thinks of it considering the content.

    I won't spoil it.

    Cheers,

    Mike


    MONSTERFEST : 4th Place - Sustained Excellence Award - WESTFEST: 3rd Place - THRILLFEST: 3rd Place


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    Senior Member Captain Pierce's Avatar
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    This isn't a script, it's a reality show! That's not fair!

    Seriously, though, interesting premise and a fun read.
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