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  1. Thread: "Pawn"

    by agalla1
    Replies
    32
    Views
    15,099

    wow....who spit in your bean curd?

    wow....who spit in your bean curd?
  2. Thread: "Contact"

    by agalla1
    Replies
    28
    Views
    4,732

    I actually got more of an "Independence Day" feel...

    I actually got more of an "Independence Day" feel with the alien...but anyway...the script was a lot of fun to read...didn't understand the gasoline canister leaking in a medical facility...but that...
  3. Thread: "Pawn"

    by agalla1
    Replies
    32
    Views
    15,099

    I needed to tie in the part of Claudius being the...

    I needed to tie in the part of Claudius being the "pawn"...I think the whooaa factor was still there but I think many reader's would question why he sent soldier's to follow Claudius....what was his...
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    3,343

    I, also was very confused about Valon's...

    I, also was very confused about Valon's motivations and thought that bride (actually bribe) meant they were harrassing a woman and that made him snap... I also read your explanation of Valon...but...
  5. Thread: Regeneration

    by agalla1
    Replies
    29
    Views
    4,609

    Enjoyed the script....really enjoyed Quinta...I...

    Enjoyed the script....really enjoyed Quinta...I know you were very pressed for time but I would like to know why Quinta was so important, what is section 8...enquiring minds have to know! I would...
  6. Thread: "Pawn"

    by agalla1
    Replies
    32
    Views
    15,099

    thanks for your feedback....I do agree with...

    thanks for your feedback....I do agree with losing a lot of the more action lines to incorporate more of the dialogue...the more I read it the more I find things I could have done differently....I...
  7. Thread: "Pawn"

    by agalla1
    Replies
    32
    Views
    15,099

    hahaha! I like the ring of Claudius Chronicles! ...

    hahaha! I like the ring of Claudius Chronicles! Happy that you liked it...I doubt scrip writing will be in my future...maybe I should stick to books! ;-)
  8. Thread: "Pawn"

    by agalla1
    Replies
    32
    Views
    15,099

    Glad you liked it! With only 6 pages to make it...

    Glad you liked it! With only 6 pages to make it work...it was my intention to have Jonas and the Lyzines take a backseat...I mainly wanted to focus on the relationship between Fiona, Dimitri and...
  9. Replies
    26
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    4,554

    Had a lot of fun reading it...you are a great...

    Had a lot of fun reading it...you are a great story teller! I liked how you led me in one direction and then completely surprised me...the end had a human and that "feel good movie of the year" sad...
  10. Replies
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    11,101

    Great job! It sounded exactly like familiar...

    Great job! It sounded exactly like familiar conversations involving "what if's" and drinking...great job on the dialogue! The ending was hilarious and didn't see it coming...overall one of my top...
  11. Thread: The Building

    by agalla1
    Replies
    22
    Views
    11,912

    Great way to show a twist to a real life...

    Great way to show a twist to a real life event...how many times do we contribute such disaster's to whatever the newsman reports...so I "government conspiracy" spin. For me, once the story read...
  12. Thread: "Evac"

    by agalla1
    Replies
    28
    Views
    6,518

    Great story...kinda pictured a bit of "Predator"...

    Great story...kinda pictured a bit of "Predator" in the scenes...I am still a little confused about the Faniki...I would have liked a little more illustration on their purpose.....the dramatic last...
  13. Thread: Jon's Fall

    by agalla1
    Replies
    47
    Views
    16,267

    Very good read...I found myself reading very...

    Very good read...I found myself reading very quickly to hurry up and get to the end to see what happened...and then found myself rereading it so I could take it all in! lol!
    ...
  14. Thread: "Pawn"

    by agalla1
    Replies
    32
    Views
    15,099

    yeah the disappearing guns could probably be tied...

    yeah the disappearing guns could probably be tied to the accidental props that are left on set while filming...and somehow make it into production...unnoticed? lol! great points...definitely things...
  15. Thread: "Pawn"

    by agalla1
    Replies
    32
    Views
    15,099

    You are quite correct about the name of the...

    You are quite correct about the name of the story...sorry if it gave it away too early!
  16. Thread: "Canada"

    by agalla1
    Replies
    24
    Views
    3,613

    maybe you already explained this...so sorry if I...

    maybe you already explained this...so sorry if I am repeating another question or observation...but I am confused w/ the concept of the dad wanting to move to Canada at the end when the beginning was...
  17. Thread: Blue Mist

    by agalla1
    Replies
    21
    Views
    3,595

    I thought the script had some interesting...

    I thought the script had some interesting elements...I did have to re-read it to understand some of the transitions in scenes...who was talking to who and what was going on in each scene. your...
  18. Thread: "Pawn"

    by agalla1
    Replies
    32
    Views
    15,099

    Thanks for the feedback! definitely are great...

    Thanks for the feedback! definitely are great observations that I wish I could have elaborated on a little more....the point of Claudius and using vampire senses to locate Fiona....I mainly was...
  19. Thread: "Best Wishes"

    by agalla1
    Replies
    19
    Views
    2,758

    I thought the concept of the script was...

    I thought the concept of the script was great.....I felt science's need to create a "Burger King child" meaning a child you get your way, special ordered....society continues to ponder what we could...
  20. Replies
    45
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    16,626

    Loved the imagination you used to write such a...

    Loved the imagination you used to write such a script...most of the time I couldn't believe what I was reading...it had a "should I be reading this..oh my gosh I cannot believe I am reading" impact! ...
  21. Thread: The Vanishing

    by agalla1
    Replies
    38
    Views
    7,903

    I like the old timey appeal to the script...it...

    I like the old timey appeal to the script...it has a "twilight zone" essence to it..I can even see it in black and white.


    SPOILER...........................................................
    ...
  22. Thread: "Synapse"

    by agalla1
    Replies
    18
    Views
    3,133

    Great script...loved the interaction between the...

    Great script...loved the interaction between the characters. I could completely see each scene unfolding..it was cohesive and thoughtful...the end definitely left me wanting to know what happens...
  23. Thread: "Pawn"

    by agalla1
    Replies
    32
    Views
    15,099

    I definitely agree that some of the scenes could...

    I definitely agree that some of the scenes could have been played out more but oh those page counts! ;-) A little more dramatic was intentional since I prefer theatre to movies...I tend ot pull...
  24. Thread: "Pawn"

    by agalla1
    Replies
    32
    Views
    15,099

    Thanks! I definitely would've preferred a...

    Thanks! I definitely would've preferred a stronger connection between Fiona and Dimitri and thinking back...probably the events leading up to the "betrayal" would have been a great story as well! ...
  25. Thread: Autonomous

    by agalla1
    Replies
    25
    Views
    3,389

    I enjoyed the story...I agree that I was little...

    I enjoyed the story...I agree that I was little lost with the motivation of the judge to tag along or why she had such a vested interest but you explained it well in your comments...loved the end...I...
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