"The Fifth Horseman" - Patrick Daniels (Rubix³)

[Rubix³]

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"Jake, I forbid you to go."


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"What are you, my father now?"

"Yeah, that's it, I'm your father. Stay home."

"Listen Vin, it's something I've gotta do."

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"There isn't even a contract out on this f**kin' place anymore. Not a note. It's been scratched! It wasn't worth the 65Gs we took to clear it in the first place-"

" - I know, I know. I told ya, I'm doing this one for Max."

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”You two hated each other in the beginning. "

"That was the beginning Vin."

"And I told ya before, James' group was called on this too. Then they sent Lena out there, that broad was immortal. She never came back. ... I know Max was a good guy. But… what if Max just ... skipped. What if he didn't want nothin' to do with the life no more Jake and just left?"


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"Max wouldn't do that Vin, and you F**KING know it."

"Listen Jake, I don't want you going out there. I DON'T want you to DO IT. You're the best cleaner I got. That place is, I dunno, cursed or somethin', Jake."

"I don't believe in ghosts, Vin."

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"But it 'aint ghosts, it's somethin' else. The place is... marked. And f**k you, nothin' scares me. Nothing but this place. Somethin' aint right there - you know that Jake - the cops don't even go out there."

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"So what? I ain't afraid. It’s a nuthouse Vin. Nothing but a bunch of f**kin' loons roaming around. Not demons. Just a bunch of f**king loons. And I'm going to kill them all. I’m gonna paint the world in their blood if I don't find Max alive. I’m gonna make a day of it."

“You're gonna die Jake.”

“I’ll call you when I’m done.”

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----

Completed & submitted.

Written & Directed: Patrick Daniels
Additional Ideas: Melanie Bemben, Keith Daniels,
Rory Basovsky

Cast & Crew:
Patrick Daniels
Matthew Pelzman
Melanie Bemben
Keith Daniels
Michelle Sheedy
Daniel Olsen
Tommy DiBenedetto

Editing & Music: Patrick Daniels

[Lingothree]

good luck getting this thing finished!

[VersuS]

He's the Horrorfest's Jack Bauer! (your lead) Thumbs up!

[Matt Sconce]

This promotional idea integrating the script as a prequel is AWESOME!!!! I want to seeee iiitt!!!!!!

[Rubix³]

Thanks for the support.

I'll be filming tonight directly after work (alone) and tomorrow again bright and early with the rest of the crew.

Hopefully we won't get rained on again, or kicked off location. I've already bribed a security guard TWICE to get him to relax.

[Jaime V]

I've already bribed a security guard TWICE to get him to relax.

Wow, was it the same guard twice? Greedy bastard! Good luck man!

[Edgen]

Rubix, I'm really digging the locations for your shoot. I'm anxious to see how that bigg willowww tree turns out in the moving picture. Man... So many great films to see in this contest.

Good luck!

/j

[GTP]

looks good... I love abandoned stuff...

[greeches]

neat scene. Done yet! ? :)

[Rubix³]

Just finished filming the last bit.

Editing away.

Weather, cops, rent-a-cops, snakes, skeeters... can't believe it's finally done.

[Edgen]

Skeeters?! Sounds like something from my neck of the woods. (back home woods that is)


glad to see you are running right down to the crunch time. :)

/j

[Rubix³]

Hey Edgen

I feel like a heel because I haven't commented on many promotional threads yet. Between fliming, editing, and being a corporate d-bag in the midst of a quarter end, I haven't been able to make the time to squat.

Though I do remember your thread perfect, especially when you first posted your poster (the wide one). Absolute eye-candy.

I'll be posting in those other threads once I'm done. Take care.

[Edgen]

No worries Rubix... This DVXUSER beast is pretty overwhelming and Its tough to see say something in all of them. Its those 'lurkers' out there that will chime in and really pull the weight and surprise the hell out of us all.

Good luck!

/j

[arielman]

Weather, cops, rent-a-cops, snakes, skeeters... can't believe it's finally done.[/quote]

lol ...been there ..well the weather and cops...congrats on finishing the short ...

Ian

[TheatreGuy]

Hey Rubex, congrats on getting it done! I am looking forward to seeing all of these films!!!

Way to pull it off!

Ted

BTW, is that YOUR Hummer in the first pic??? :)

[Rubix³]

Thanks Ted. Not my hummer, unfortunately. Though that is me in the black. =D

[Robert Eldon]

Rubix,

I noticed that you filmed in the woods and you mentioned the 'bugs'. I filmed a couple of scenes in the woods as well.

How did you manage working in the woods? You know, the logistics of the equipment, crew, cast... facilities (if you know what i mean?), keeping stuff clean, etc.?

And 'The Fifth Horseman'... any biblical significance?

[Rubix³]

I wish I could reveal more about the title... but I really can't. I'm not trying to be a film snob or anything... I just don't want to spoil anything...

Twists and turns have become so overused in Hollywood, but I'm hoping there's still some virture left in them. :D

I'm a lucky guy this time around. I had some really great people with me, including my best friend (who's getting married this Saturday) and my brother - the smartest man I've ever known. Then there's a few girlfriends, who we always need to thank for waking up at 8am on a Saturday & Sunday in a row.

The location is basically condemned and forbidden to the public due to the bugs. It's a water reclamation disctrict and has been deemed "tick lake." I brought a bunch of "off," the clear, oh so fresh kind, and sprayed up every 30 minutes. Worked really well (while I knock on wood for fear of spewing my stomach lining onto this laptop from the unknown & slow infecting "D-TAB" strain of "west nile").

[Gord.T]

Hey Rubix. Thanx for visiting the Draco Thread. Shooting in the woods(er, living) is not totally unknown to (mmm, some) of us. In fact, it generally is our only location (aka living quarters, aka 'TENT'). Sorry, too busy laughing. Aside, the name of your movie is for some GOOD reason etched in my brain(???) and looking forward to it. Your on my priority list Rubix.
(p.s. Are you guys serious about shooting in the woods? Bahahaha.)

[Matt Sconce]

Matt Sconce's Review of The Fifth Horseman
SPOLIERS POSSIBLE!

Script
I thought this was a weak spot for this film. I understood that the cleaner dude lost a person in this place that is supposed to be cursed. he went back to get the people who possibly killed him, but ended up dying just like them because a cloaked due makes them do it. I did not understand who the claoked guy was or anything like that.
Acting
The acting felt forced to me. Just not very natural.
Cinematography
The awesome highlight of this movie. Some of these shots were great! I want to congratulate you on capturing some beautiful footage.
Editing
The editing was okay, but the shot where your lead shoots the first guy need to be either cut, or tweaked because you can see the person making the blood effect happen standing right behind them. that really pulled me out of the story. I would also watch what shotgun blasts look like and try to find Muzzle flashes and entry wound patterns that fit the weapon.
Overall Impressions
Interesting short. I thought the settings and costuming were great. I think a little more development in the story and effects could help this short. i alos think it would benefit from being cut shorter. Congrats on getting this done and in the contest!

[VersuS]

I wanted to watch this one ever since you started your thread. Seemed quite promising.

I loved the location and the cinematography. I agree with Matt, its the highlight in this one. There were some really nice shots, like the birds flying in the sky. I also liked the visions he had (though I didnt quite get it story-wise)..and the bit where he stepped on some shit (?)...funny!

I liked the scream as well that echoed in the woods....

However this one had 2 major negatives.
One was acting, it was forced as Matt said and not natural..even the scream which was a nice touch to put there..was...so-so....
The second one is the fx/attention to detail....the smoke from the guns is not only 'fake' but not needed...I dont recall seeing a pistol produce such effect in real life (and I shot with a lot of guns when in the army)....
Then you have that guy holding your first victim,dont know if its for the blood effect or to just help his balance while falling behind...but i watched it 4 times and it is very very very poorly delivered...I d rather if you had a matress laying low in the grass for the guy to land onto....and then when he puts the gun in his mouth I think he's wearing some prop around his neck that would produce the blood splatter...am I correct?

ps. nice try, but you should have paid more attention to those details because there were some films in here that lacked in cinematography but where thoroughly planned and didnt put me off the course at no point

ps2. I almost forgot, at the beginning it was very clever to use the phone conversation to shed some light into your lead's intentions but it kept on going too long and I got tired with the sound of the telephone line...
Hope we see more from you!!!

[TheatreGuy]

Hey Rubix, Congrats on getting your film shot, completed and in the festival!!!

I am not sure of your experience but I am guessing that you are fairly new. With that in mind, I feel that you have a great future ahead of you as you learn more.

I say this because, you show many promising aspects as a filmmaker. I really enjoyed your use of the phone to open the story and establish information. Very effective.

I loved your cinematography. This in itself is a HUGE challenge. I think that you came out look good in this department.

I admire your ambition to take on such a complex story in a 6 minute short. I mean, a guy finding his buddy dead, hunting down the enemy and then contemplating and executing his own death. HUGE STUFF MAN! And you got it all in there.

What you need to focus on, in my opinion is the story-telling aspect. I wish that I could give you advice, but I am learning myself. The one thing I would say is that I got confused in parts. (This happen to me in my film. Test audiences who are not familiar with your story, listen to them and implement changes that can help clear things up.) Just my opinion and what I learned on my film. And I STILL left the audience confused!!! :)

The VFX were not needed in my opinion. You should some good action shots and the "fake" effects brought your film down in my opinion. Also, IF YOU CANNOT HIDE A PERSON behind another person... DON'T DO IT!!!! I actually STOPPED your film, rewound it and watch it twice, then frame by frame! Talk about losing an audience member! It wasn't necessary for the effect and it was so distracting.

But hey, that is what this forum is for. Learning!

You did a great job of editing all that footage together and making a film!

Congrats, man!

Tede

[Kholi]

Review | POSSIBLE SPOILER ALERT! I watch the movies first time around strictly for enjoyment, second and third for review.


Hey a quick review from me. I found that this short was quite disjointed and didn't feel like horror to me. I have no idea what was going on, aside from a hitman out in the middle of nowhere going crazy? I also didn't feel the beginning too much. The long phone conversation turned me off from the get go.

I think that you just have to put in a bit more effort. This is a learning experience for sure. I'll keep an eye out for future work. Good job on getting out there and doing something.

[Paul Coleman]

SPOILER

This one was a mixed effort, but the "shadow people" was a great idea and well done. Also, I like the idea that the hitman is being judged for his arrogance. Overall, I like the film.:beer:

One of the best moments was seeing the shadow behind the man being killed. As if the crazy people are just puppets being controlled by the shadows. Anyway, I thought that was intentional; and worked well.

[jpbankesmercer]

Acting: Not bad not amazing, but no dialogue to speak of so it’s hard to tell.
Script: Action-Horror!
Direction: Some interesting ideas going on here.
Music: Nice guitar work.
Editing: Not bad.
Lighting: Some nice use of natural lighting.
Loved: The phone call to start the story, the dog dirt on the shoes idea (made me laugh), the first focus pull, squibs! Nice dude, some of the fx on the gunshots, loved the smoke!
Hated: The tiny blood spot on the guys shirt with no exit-wound, the blood being poured down the guys face,
Overall: 24 meets Invasion of the body snatchers, all over the place mixing styles but good going trying something different.

J.P.

PLEASE LEAVE COMMENTS ON BROKEN CIRCLE (WE NEED EM!)

[Lingothree]

Review | POSSIBLE SPOILER ALERT! I watch the movies first time around strictly for enjoyment, second and third for review.


Hey a quick review from me. I found that this short was quite disjointed and didn't feel like horror to me. I have no idea what was going on, aside from a hitman out in the middle of nowhere going crazy? I also didn't feel the beginning too much. The long phone conversation turned me off from the get go.

I think that you just have to put in a bit more effort. This is a learning experience for sure. I'll keep an eye out for future work. Good job on getting out there and doing something.

I have to say ditto to that - this did feel pretty disjointed.

I did like the style of the voiceover, although I agree it did get a little lengthy.

Sorry for the brief review - running out of voting time...

[TheatreGuy]

Rubix, Congratulations and Good Luck on your film!

This has been a great experience!

Til the next time!

Ted

[jpbankesmercer]

Best of luck guys!

[Norm Sanders]

Just finally getting the time to copy the notes I compiled in a Word doc while watching the shorts:

So the fifth horseman gets the bad guys by getting in their heads & getting them to kill themselves? Then who were all those folks that came running to or at him in the woods? Also, the first guy that was running at him, when he was shot there was CLEARLY someone standing behind him. Couldn’t that have been masked out? Otherwise an interesting submission, and I enjoyed it enough to where I wanted to finish it … vs. a few submissions have been painful to watch, and I’m not sure I’ve ever said that before in a fest. Some GREAT cinematography too, which was helped by the spectacular clouds/sky in the BG.