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View Full Version : "Broken" - A script in need of a filmmaker...



Chris Messineo
12-04-2007, 09:59 AM
I wrote a script that I think thematically is perfect for LoveFest.

"Broken (http://www.offstagefilms.com/files/broken.pdf)" - A lonely pathologist discovers tiny treasures in a cadaver and a heart not unlike her own.

You can click on the title to read the script.

It does present certain filmmaking challenges, but if you are up for it, I would love to hear from you.

cinealma
12-04-2007, 10:05 AM
Chris, I wanted to take a little look at your script, but the link isn't working?

Robbie Comeau
12-04-2007, 10:09 AM
Here ya go cinealma:

http://www.offstagefilms.com/files/broken.pdf

One to many http's. Chris:D

Ps, isn't there already two movies called Broken? Lol

r

Larry Rutledge
12-04-2007, 10:14 AM
The link has been fixed.

Chris Messineo
12-04-2007, 10:15 AM
Thanks for fixing the link and taking a look at the script.

Slimothy
12-04-2007, 10:52 AM
I just read it. Great job Chris. This, if done right would be excellent.

Chris Messineo
12-04-2007, 11:00 AM
I just read it. Great job Chris. This, if done right would be excellent.
Thanks a lot.

It definitely has some challenges, but I would love to see a talented filmmaker make it work.

Mark Harris
12-04-2007, 11:03 AM
I was just thinking to myself: "I have exactly those two things laying around, and no story to go with them!" :)

Chris Messineo
12-04-2007, 11:04 AM
What two things, an autopsy table and a carnival tent? :)

Mark Harris
12-04-2007, 11:05 AM
I was going to say the Corpse and the Circus. :)

SimonB
12-04-2007, 11:07 AM
Indeed. It might be a little challenging for someone with a low budget.
I'd like to see this made, though.:)

SimonB
12-04-2007, 11:08 AM
By the way, I was quoting Slimothy. Forgot to refresh before posting reply.

Chris Messineo
12-04-2007, 12:25 PM
Something some people might find interesting. I always write while music is playing and this story was written with a heavy dose of Tom Waits..

Robbie Comeau
12-04-2007, 12:46 PM
I write when music plays to!! I wasn't sure if It should be on or not, but meh

Simon Höfer
12-04-2007, 01:01 PM
Something some people might find interesting. I always write while music is playing and this story was written with a heavy dose of Tom Waits..

Do you also have your main ideas while listening to music? Or do you just write while listening?

Writing with music is no problem for me, once I have the main concept.

Interesting story :) Unfortunately not so easy to turn into a movie on a low budget.

Chris Messineo
12-04-2007, 01:05 PM
Do you also have your main ideas while listening to music? Or do you "just" write while listening.
Both, since I go through life with music playing.

Herman Witkam
12-05-2007, 11:25 AM
Something some people might find interesting. I always write while music is playing and this story was written with a heavy dose of Tom Waits..

cool!

I bet Jarmusch does that too :)

Chris Messineo
12-05-2007, 11:32 AM
cool!

I bet Jarmusch does that too :)

I bet he does. Waits music for "Night on Earth" is perfect.

Blaine
12-05-2007, 11:35 AM
It's always nice to find someone that appreciates Tom Waits. :thumbsup:

cinealma
12-05-2007, 11:42 AM
Tom Waits is a favorite of mine, too. Chris mentioned Night on Earth, but I really like the opening shots of Down By Law: the down-and-out streets of New Orleans flowing by with "Jockey Full of Bourbon" playing on the soundtrack.

Luis Caffesse
12-05-2007, 01:23 PM
This has gone totally off topic....but "The Piano has been drinking" has always been one of my favorites....
...actually, that whole album is great (small change).
:thumbsup:

Chris Messineo
12-05-2007, 02:12 PM
This has gone totally off topic....
That's okay, we can discuss Tom Waits in my thread anytime. :)

Have you all heard, "Orphans - Brawlers, Bawlers, & Bastards"? It came out last year and I LOVE it.

Herman Witkam
12-06-2007, 03:07 AM
Tom Waits is a favorite of mine, too. Chris mentioned Night on Earth, but I really like the opening shots of Down By Law: the down-and-out streets of New Orleans flowing by with "Jockey Full of Bourbon" playing on the soundtrack.

Yeah - The opening is amazing! The combination of Waits's song and those drive by shots of New Orleans definitely stays on your retina!

andreww
12-06-2007, 11:07 AM
So is the Tom Waits inspiration just a really heavy baseline over the course of the piece or has the raspy bourbon voice designed the writing?

StefanHaynes
12-06-2007, 11:31 AM
Some of the images were nice. Reminded me a bit of the underrated "Wolf Girl" (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0265752/). The dialog needs some work though.

The plot is also a tad predictable. While I was glad at the lack of twist... it just all slid together too logically, too formulaic for me. With a script at these levels of demands, it seems like it could have done much, much more.

But, as I said, nice images.

Chris Messineo
12-06-2007, 01:02 PM
So is the Tom Waits inspiration just a really heavy baseline over the course of the piece or has the raspy bourbon voice designed the writing?
I think music just helps sets the mood when I am writing. It helps me get in touch with the emotions to which I am trying to connect.

djsmackmackey
12-17-2007, 11:14 AM
It does need some work at the end I think. It's too abrupt. But there is some truly exceptional stuff here. I could very clearly see it in my mind as I read it. Great job!

ConspiracyPenguin
01-15-2008, 08:00 PM
I think music just helps sets the mood when I am writing. It helps me get in touch with the emotions to which I am trying to connect.

Spoken right out of my mind. When I write I always play music, it tends to help me orchestrate the entire scene much better then in silence.