Shalloween

[Duff]

Because let's be honest -- with a theme like "Darkness", what's more fitting than a comedy that isn't even dark in the slightest? Hope you all enjoy it.

[Kholi]

The title made me LOL.

[Brandon Rice]

Great title :thumbsup:

[MOVIE STUNTS]

With all the creepiness going on we may all need some comedy relief!:thumbsup:

[Marlon Ladd]

Good luck!

[Jay Rodriguez]

lol, you guys are shot out! haha

"here's to a spooky night" wings the wine glass... LMAO!

Looked like some of the ADR was off though

[Billy Pilgrim]

Very funny film. It made me literally "lol". Hilarious.

[Michael Anthony Horrigan]

Funny stuff! A few rough edits, but pretty good.

Nice work guys.

Mike

[Duff]

Thanks for the feedback! Some background info:

I wrote this in an hour, shot it in a few hours over two days without a crew -- the three other actors (my roommates) you see in the short were the only crew I had, and edited it in a few hours over two days. That being said, there are definitely some quality issues that could have been worked out if I wasn't rushing to meet a deadline (I just found out about this fest a week ago).

Lighting was ambient in the kitchen scenes (the kitchen is lit overhead by a fixture of four fluorescent bulbs), and in all the other scenes was provided by a home depot worklight bounced off the ceiling and a sheet of foam core for bounce, and in some cases supplemented with a clamp light. The audio was an AT897 shotgun taped (yes, taped) to the end of a lightbulb changing pole. I just want to emphasize how low-budget this actually was, haha.

Now, I realize mine isn't as serious as the other submissions, but I would seriously love critiques and advice.

Also, I have $1500 that I'm about to spend on lighting and sound equipment. Problem is, a decent light kit takes up the entire budget, and a decent sound kit takes up at least $1000, so I have to prioritize. Which stood out more as lacking -- light or sound?


Looked like some of the ADR was off though

Bah, that actually wasn't even ADR. A drop out during import caused all the audio to get out of sync for that clip. I lined it back up on the timeline, but for some reason the exported version was offset by a frame or so. I didn't have time to wait for another export.

[Luis Caffesse]

Hurling the wine glass definitely got a laugh out of me.
:)

[cinealma]

REVIEW:
A little rough but with a little polish this is definitely I could see on MTV or VH1 or something. Yeah, the part where the guy hurls the wine glass and yells "Party!", I laughed out loud. Good job.

FILMMAKER-TO-FILMMAKER:
ADR was off a bit on some dialogue by the "old college roomate". I liked the reality/doc feel to it. Acting was a little... eh, but it worked itself out I think. Don't sell yourself short by saying "btw, I wrote this in an hour and shot late at night and I edited on my lunch break at my second job, etc., etc." A lot of people do that to excuse perceived deficiencies and it drives me nuts. It is what it is, man. You did a good job and I am sure you and your roommates were rolling on the floor when you guys watched the final product. That's worth it, no?

Cheers!

[Dmitry Yun]

I'm pooping...I'm pooping, heheh you're some funny fellas I'll tell ya :)

[mrcheapyasui]

I thought it was great, except I was disappointed with the ending. When he kept saying "its not that kind of party," I was expecting it to turn into some crazy cult ritual or something after he left,, not just a boring work party. Funny stuff regardless!

[Brandon Rice]

hehe, some funny stuff going on here... the payoff was kind of weak (he just steals the wine) but there were some funny lines!

[Blaine]

I liked this...

Bad ADR. Okay, the acting is kind of bad (perhaps by intent?) and the story was kind of stupid BUT it was pretty damned funny and I laughed a lot. so...

I liked it.

[mentatDUKE]

"Everybody has their idiosyncracies."
Heheh. I really liked this. Snappy dialogue. Clever. Would love to see more from you guys.

[George_Bailey]

This I liked.

Nice writing. Funny. Even though the sound was off, the acting was amusing.

Was the interior kitchen scene shot interlaced? The interior shots looked like it but then the exterior scene looked nice.

Recently a lot of people have made a lot of money with stories of returning roommates. Maybe you should expand this? Could be fun.

Thanks. It was fun.

[Duff]

Thanks everyone. I'm really happy with the response to this. I'm glad that it's coming off as entertaining (a lot of things seem hilarious when they're scripted, but don't always turn out that way when acted out).


REVIEW:
FILMMAKER-TO-FILMMAKER:
ADR was off a bit on some dialogue by the "old college roomate". I liked the reality/doc feel to it. Acting was a little... eh, but it worked itself out I think. Don't sell yourself short by saying "btw, I wrote this in an hour and shot late at night and I edited on my lunch break at my second job, etc., etc." A lot of people do that to excuse perceived deficiencies and it drives me nuts. It is what it is, man. You did a good job and I am sure you and your roommates were rolling on the floor when you guys watched the final product. That's worth it, no?

Cheers!

Honestly, I wasn't trying to make excuses. I'm happy with the final result -- it's probably my best effort to date, rushed editing aside. I was just trying to clarify that the criticisms I'm looking for are in the foundations of the video, not regarding lighting or audio nuances (though I really wish I'd had the time to fix the audio syncing in that one scene).


hehe, some funny stuff going on here... the payoff was kind of weak (he just steals the wine) but there were some funny lines!

This seems to be common consensus that the ending is weak. I thought it would work out, but I guess in such a short video, there needs to be a funnier resolution. Oh well, live and learn.


This I liked.

Nice writing. Funny. Even though the sound was off, the acting was amusing.

Was the interior kitchen scene shot interlaced? The interior shots looked like it but then the exterior scene looked nice.

Recently a lot of people have made a lot of money with stories of returning roommates. Maybe you should expand this? Could be fun.

Thanks. It was fun.

It was all shot in 24p. The natural fluorescent lighting in the kitchen could have made it seem a bit weird. I'm buying some lights from cool lights when I get the money, but right now I'm debating between sound or lighting first (due to limited cash)

I have some longer scripts I'm working on with similar characters, but these characters were created just for this short. I'll be sure to post the new videos I finish here -- this forum's great for honest feedback from fellow filmmakers.

Thanks everyone for the free critiques. I'll be sure to return the favor when I get the time to watch all the videos :)

[MOVIE MASTER]

This I liked.

Nice writing. Funny. Even though the sound was off, the acting was amusing.

Was the interior kitchen scene shot interlaced? The interior shots looked like it but then the exterior scene looked nice.

Recently a lot of people have made a lot of money with stories of returning roommates. Maybe you should expand this? Could be fun.



cool flick!

[J.R. Hudson]

I was laughing on the intor scene; too funny and an effective was to engage the audience. I kind of liked this, but also wondered at the end of the day what the hell it was about ?

The technical aspects were nothing to mention; but the deadpan performances and comedy kept me engaged until the end; even if I didn't get exactly what it was about. :P

[lauralouface]

Seems pretty obvious to me that it was about an annoying party boy crashing his friend's sophisticated party...HILARIOUS. I laughed all through this one. I dig humor way more than blood and guts, and while I didn't see the darkness theme in there, I didn't really care. It was really funny :)

[Maximus]

Obviously not dark, pretty darn light as a matter of fact.

I liked it though. When the guy chugs his wine then throws the wine glass, unexpected and very funny. If this was Comedy Fest you might have a winner!

[Jazz Dog]

Dude, nice. I was pretty annoyed until the guy said "it's pronounced Shawn." Super clever. I laughed out loud. Looks like you hade some fun with that one.
Listen to your audio with headphones and try to blend it a bit better. The audio should never even be noticed if it is done right...

[andoguru]

Hey Duff,

Pretty funny. It was shot pretty well and I thought the dialogue and acting was good. I thought there should have been a lot more payoff in the end like the party being something really dark and spooky like they were going to sacrifice animals or kill Shawn or something and his friend telling him,"I told you this wasn't your type of party." Or something along those lines. Probably could have been a little tighter. Overall it was decent, but it didn't really have a payoff.

Laters,
Ando

[John LaBonney]

I had a good laugh watching this. Good job. It did as you say miss the darkness theme.

I thought the sound (aside from the ADR) and the lighting were better than the average short. A little music might have pepped this up a bit.

I thought the Shawn character was great.

Nice job!